The Amazing Power of Small Gains

The desire for progress is innate in humans.

If it wasn’t, we wouldn’t have went from swinging out of trees in africa to dominating the world.

Dopamine is the molecule of more, to quote Daniel Lieberman. The hunt for progress is part of who we are.

But how does progress actually happen?

Nobody really knows. I certainly didn’t.

Not Understanding How Progress Works

If you think I’m patient with progress now, it’s because I have trained myself to be.

I was naturally very impatient. I wanted progress instantly like we all do.

The earliest memory of not understanding how progress worked was in my early teens.

I was at the desk in my room trying to build a little toy car, but it just wasn’t happening.

Nothing I tried was working.

I could feel tension rising in myself. I felt uneasy. I didn’t like it.

Soccer came naturally to me, but this didn’t.

I tried again – nope. I tried another way – nope.

The frustration started to boil over inside me now.

After a few more dead ends, I picked up the tool and hurled it towards the floor in a rage! I cut a big line into the floorboard.

I still see that cut on the floorboard when I am working from my family home.

It reminds me of who I used to be. How little control I had over myself. How little I knew about how progress worked.

Skip forward to now where I have patiently chased down my life goals over months, years & decades.

Enjoying the journey and my own evolution. The difference is night and day.

And one of the most pivotal concepts that helped me get there was the power of small gains.

It’s no exaggeration to say it completely changed my life.

It can do the same for you.

The Amazing Power of Small Gains

I will bring you through the timeline & process of how I learned about the small gains, and implemented it in my life.

1) Evolution

“You are living proof of the amazing power of small gains”

When I started to become obsessed with the human body to overcome my chronic pain & injury, I stumbled upon evolutionary biology.

This led me to realise the story of the human bodywhy chronic pain was inevitable in this modern environment, and how to finally overcome it.

But it also led me to stumble across this concept which I coined ‘small gains’ for myself.

Which was the understanding that there literally is no such thing as massive jumps in progress. With nature, with our bodies, with anything in life. It’s all small gains.

I realised a fundamental truth that changed how I viewed progress forever:

“Big gains are an illusion. Any big gain, is just an accumulation of small gains over time”.

But we don’t understand this. We think there are big gains.

So when the big progress doesn’t happen quickly from our misguided expectations, we naturally lose motivation and drop off.

Now we subscribe to the idea that ‘it didn’t work for us’ or ‘there is something wrong with my body’ etc. Pick your poison.

This is not the truth. It’s a narrative, a story you tell yourself.

But it doesn’t matter. Because if you believe this, then it will become your truth. It will be a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Even just think of the word ‘evolution’. It means ‘to evolve’.

And what does ‘evolve’ mean? To ‘develop gradually’.

Develop gradually.

This is the only way change can happen. In humans. In nature. In the world.

With mobility, strength, skills, sports, business, relationships, life.

Progress happens gradually and slowly. Progress happens in small gains.

Any big gain you see, is just an accumulation of small gains over time.

The bigger the gain appears -> the more small gains that are stacked up.

There is a tipping point when all the small gains start to appear like a big gain.

But there is nothing special or miraculous about it at all. It’s just small gains.

Think of it like an iceberg:

  • You only see the tip of the iceberg (the achievements/accomplishments of others)
  • You don’t see the 95% of the iceberg under the water. (All the small gains it took to achieve the ‘big gain’)
  • Now your perception of progress is distorted

The evolution of the human species is a perfect example of small gains in action.

6 million years ago, humans and chimps diverged from a common ancestor and went on different evolutionary paths.

On the human path: 200,000 years ago, after many species of humans, homo-sapiens emerged (the species of human we are today).

We are born into this modern world and think nothing of it. It’s all we know.

But in reality, it’s been millions of years of small gains that has led to you being alive today. To be the species of human that you are.

The truth is that you are living proof of the amazing power of small gains.

When I understood this empowering truth of small gains, more research led me to find out that this concept already existed.

It was called the power of tiny gains. And was already popularised by the book “Atomic Habits”.

2) Science

As you know by now, small gains are incremental bits of progress.

But most people don’t realise the amazing power it has over time:

If you get 1% better each day, you are 37% better each year.

The ironic thing is that you probably already use the power of small gains in other areas of your life without realising.

Your pension is a great example.

A few hundred euro each month is useless in terms of sustaining your lifestyle when you retire.

But compound that over 40 years of work & compound interest, and now all the small gains have turned into a massive gain that will sustain you.

It makes complete sense to use there, but unfortunately that logic & understanding usually doesn’t transfer over to other areas of our life.

We expect the quick fix and fast progress due to our many human biases that distort our thinking.

Another example that stuck with me:

A penny doubled every day for just 30 days ends up being over 5 million.

Don’t underestimate the compounding effect of small gains.

3) Perspective Change -> Behaviour Change

“Perspective change leads to behaviour change”

Perspective change is so important, because it leads to behaviour change.

And you behave your way to success or failure over time.

Once my perspective changed from distorted views of progress, to the actual truth of small gains, I was empowered.

Instead of settling and giving up on my athletic career after I was told I had no choice, I knew it wasn’t over for me.

I knew I could come back to some capacity if I got the right training and followed the process of just aiming for small gains each session, each day, each week, each month.

It was time to not settle and start making deposits in the mobility bank. I now realised it would add up like a pension over time.

I knew I was onto something, but I honestly couldn’t have comprehended what would happen:

  • 1 year later: I returned to Jiu-Jitsu & the gym
  • 2 years after that: I hit the front splits which I was told was impossible for my hips
  • 1 year after that: I hit the pancake and had access to nearly all movements possible for the human body again

It blew me away.

I was the one that people were calling the ‘flexible’ guy, thinking these ‘big gains’ came naturally to me?!

Now I could see why so many people settle and think they can’t get progress with mobility or anything else in life:

Because they just don’t understand how progress works.

4) Progress Is Inevitable In Time

When I had cultivated the don’t settle attitude, and paired this with the understanding of the amazing power of small gains:

I was a force to be reckoned with.

I used to think I couldn’t change, that I was the way I was.

I didn’t make it in soccer and I thought that talent was set in stone. That you either have it or you don’t.

I was weak, skinny, shy, unconfident, and many other things. I thought that’s the way I would be forever.

But now for the first time in my life: I knew any progress that I wanted was inevitable in time. The small gain train will take me there.

I started chasing down all my goals like our hunter-gatherer ancestors did their prey: endurance hunting.

I picked out all my goals like a kid in a sweet shop, knowing they are all inevitable in time if I don’t settle and keep chasing the small gains.

Nearly a decade later and I have:

  • regained my physical freedom and taken it to elite levels
  • became stronger physically & mentally than I ever thought possible
  • turned my passion to my career
  • came out from behind the mask, lived true to myself, and became who I knew I could be

I behaved my way to success, one small gain at a time.

All from a perspective change, which came from taking ownership & educating myself.

Which shattered the idea of big gains and showed me the truth of how progress worked.

Big Gains Are An Illusion

“Big gains are an illusion, it’s just an accumulation of small gains over time”

Humans are wired to want instant gratification, so we are naturally blind to the power of small gains.

But when you train yourself to see the truth, you can’t unsee it.

Big gains are an illusion. There is no such thing.

With our body, with our mindset, with business/career, with relationships, with nature, with anything.

Now you’ll go back out into the world and see others trapped in their limiting beliefs.

“I could never”, “why bother”, “you won’t be able”, “it’s impossible”, “how does he do that?”.

Settling protects your ego, but it’s the graveyard for dreams and the fertile land for regret.

Stay there at your peril.

When I look back to that moment where I felt like the tin man and was told by 5 experts in a row that it’s over for me, time to settle. Tha is where my initial drive came from.

I know what it’s like to hit rock bottom with your body and many other areas of life, and I know it doesn’t have to be the end for you.

Settling is a choice, not a pre-determined destiny.

You can choose to not settle.

You can choose to chase the small gains.

So many people give up on themselves because they don’t understand the amazing power of small gains.

But now you do. You have the secret of progress.

You know more about how progress works than 99% of the world.

Go wield this superpower to wage war on your goals. To make them inevitable in time.

It’s time to get on the small gain train.

All Aboard The Small Gain Train

The small gains are all I’ve ever got.

The small gains are all I ever need.

They are all you need.

So many clients and people on Instagram have thanked me for the concept of small gains. Telling me how it has changed their life.

I teach all my clients about the amazing power of small gains, and this is what arms them on their journey of progress from the start!

It’s tools like this that make you so much more likely to get progress than the average person.

Michael’s journey is a great example. Read this snippet around small gains, then read the full review. You can see how the understanding of small gains has been one of the main catalysts for his amazing progress.

Other clients that come to mind on the small gains are Peter O’Donoghue & Anna Cafolla.

If you are ready to get on the small gain train towards overcoming your chronic pain & injury, check out the Physical Freedom Program.

DM me on IG or send me an email to guywhodidntsettle@gmail.com.

Don’t settle,
Mark

A Simple Guide to Beast Level Cardio

My Vo2 max recently hit 55 for the first time ever.

Or at least since I started tracking it 6 years ago.

Who knows if it was this high during my soccer prime as a youngster?

Either way, it’s been roughly 53 for the last 6 years. This year I have got it to 55.

It was a shock to be honest. With my badly torn right meniscus, I haven’t been consistent with Jiu-Jitsu & kickboxing. Which were my main sources of cardio.

But after reflecting on it, it does make sense.

You know my don’t settle attitude by now. If I can’t do what I want, I’ll do what I can.

I can’t do martial arts, but I can do cardio on low impact machines.

So I have been working on the crosstrainer & assault bike for my cardio.

In this newsletter I’ll lay out the basic science behind cardio, and how you can take yours to beast levels with a simple guide.

Fatigue Forged Me

I was a fit kid.

If I had anything going for me naturally (as it certainly wasn’t mobility or strength!), it was cardio.

I could run all day in matches.

I would never be limited by my lungs, but I started to become limited by my body. You know that story by now.

I never actually knew the science around cardio or how to train it properly. I just did the training I was told to do by my coaches in various sports.

Years later when I was doing martial arts, I had a moment that sparked my interest in learning about cardio:

I experienced absolute & utter physical exhaustion.

I had never experienced anything like this. Not in any match or moment of life before.

It floored me, literally.

I actually didn’t think a human could feel like this. I thought I knew what fatigue was, but I had no clue.

It was during my first Jiu-jitsu competition as a white belt. I didn’t do any ‘competition prep’. I just relied on my training and natural ‘pretty good’ cardio.

I got humiliated.

Let’s just say I understand the saying “fatigue makes cowards of us all”. You can read that story here.

Instead of shying away from it, I turned this pain into progress.

I decided it was time to take cardio seriously and start learning about it.

You know my strategy: I follow the results.

So I bought Joel Jamiesons book “Ultimate MMA Conditioning”, and then his course “BioForce Conditioning”. He has experience training elite UFC champions in cardio.

It’s an extremely detailed course (still haven’t finished the full thing).

But I’ll give you one major piece of information from it, and 2 methods you can use.

After this newsletter you will be able to plug & play this into your own training schedule.

Cardio Condensed

There is so much information out there.

So many flashy objects to follow, leaving us chasing our tail and none the wiser.

The starting point for taking ownership of your cardio is learning about the 3 energy systems.

Then understanding the best bang for your buck way to incorporate cardio into your training.

1) Energy Systems

The energy currency of the human body is called ATP. (adenosine triphosphate)

Every cell in your body relies on this. From your muscles to your heart, lungs and other organs.

ATP can be created in 2 different ways:

1) The aerobic system
2) The anaerobic system (alactic & lactic)

The aerobic system can produce ATP slowly, but in a nearly endless supply.
(extremely efficient energy production)

The anaerobic system can produce ATP very quickly, but in a very limited supply.
(extremely inefficient energy production)

Once you understand this, you can see that the task will decide how your body will produce the energy required. Through aerobic or anaerobic pathways.

For example:

  • if you need a lot of ATP very quickly (sprints), then your body will utilise the anerobic system.
  • if you don’t need ATP quickly (low intensity exercise or everyday living), then your body will utilise the aerobic system.

The aerobic system can sustain energy output nearly endlessly. (think of how long you could keep walking for if you had to).

While the anaerobic system can only sustain energy output for around 10-60 seconds.
(think of an all-out sprint)

The best example to see all systems in action is a sprint (running or on the assault bike):

  • The first 5-10/15 seconds of blistering speed (anaerobic: CP system)
  • From 10/15-60 seconds of fast pace (anaerobic: glycotic)
  • 60 seconds onwards where they slow down and eventually stuck at a slow pace gasping for air (aerobic)

This is shown in the graph below. (ATP & lactic are the anaerobic systems)

Now you will realise why this happens & what the words mean:

– Aerobic (WITH oxygen)
– Anaerobic (WITHOUT oxygen)

When your body can no longer produce more energy without oxygen (anaerobically), it will force you to slow down and start heaving to try and get more oxygen into your system (as you can only produce energy with oxygen now: aerobically).

A practical example of this:

If I am sparring someone in Jiu-Jitsu and they start mouth breathing and huffing/puffing while I can still breathe through my nose, I know they are gassing out quicker than me.

If I push the pace, they will crumble first.

When you see someone panting, they are on borrowed time.

They can’t produce any more energy without oxygen, so to continue they have to either:

  • slow down and produce energy aerobically
  • stop and rest to recover the ability to produce energy anaerobically

If you are confused, don’t worry. It takes time for all this to make sense. You are getting a crash course here.

The easiest way to think of it for now is the following:

  • aerobic = the engine
  • anaerobic = the nitrous injection boost

The nitrious boost only lasts 60 max, and takes a while to replenish (3-5 minutes). The engine is what sustains the vast majority of your energy in sport & life.

The engine is also what replenishes the nitrious. The bigger the engine, the faster you recover between the bouts of higher output.

Now you probably see the biggest flaw for most people: working on high intensity while neglecting the engine. (hello HIIT training)

Majoring in the minors.

The way to build beast level cardio is through a big engine.

The high intensity stuff is the cherry on top of your aerobic cake.

2) Low & Slow

Low & slow is the aerobic work. Building the engine.

The good thing about the aerobic work is that it can be anything as long as your heart rate stays in a certain range for a certain amount of time.

The guideline is:

130-150bpm for 30-90 minutes.

So you can:

  • Run
  • Swim
  • Cycle
  • Crosstrainer
  • Sport specific movements

As long as you keep your heart rate in the right zone for the alloted time, you will get the positive adaptations.

Which are:

1) Eccentric Cardiac Hypertrophy (i.e bigger heart)
2) Capillary density (i.e more veins/capillaries to deliver oxygen)
3) Increased Mitochondria (i.e improve how tissues utilise oxygen)

Now that I have the menisuc issue, I choose low impact options for my aerobic work (swim & crosstrainer).

But before this & after, I will use Jiu-Jitsu & kickboxing too.

To me, doing 6×5 minute rounds on the bag working technique, is more fun than 30 mins on a crosstrainer.

But if you can’t do what you want, you do what you can.

I usually have an interesting podcast ready to listen to for the low & slow cardio so it takes my mind off the boring task.

I have worked up to 60 minutes on the crosstrainer.

Instead of smal gaining my way up to 90 minutes (for time reasons), I am upping the intensity instead.

Doing 60 mins on the crosstrainer at level 13, is much different than 60 mins on the crosstrainer at level 1.

So that’s important to note: you can improve your aerobic system by completing the same time at a higher intensity.

But remember, your heart rate has to stay in the aerobic zone. If my heart rate started spiking upwards, then it’s not going to work.

If you don’t have a heart rate watch or monitor to track, a good gauge is if you can:

  • still breath through your nose
  • hold a conversation

If you can’t do those things, chances are you need to lower the intensity for now.

Remember, it’s low & slow. It should be relatively easy.

We leave the hard stuff for the sprints.

3) Hard & Fast

Hard & fast is the anaerobic work. Upgrading your explosive power.

There are many different methods, but an easy one to follow is explosive repeats. This trains your explosive endurance.

The guideline is:

5-20 sets x 10s hard/60s rest.

I started with 5 sets, now I’m up to 12. I want to get 20 sets by the end of the year.

You can know what level you are at when you can’t complete the next set at the same high intensity.

Completing sets at a low pace (aerobically), defeats the whole purpose.

That’s aerobic training, not anaerobic training.

Now you are stuck in no mans land: not training the aerobic system properly (low & slow) and not training the anaerobic system properly (hard & fast).

Aim to stay out of the middle, which is unfortunately what a lot of people do.

The human body is incredibly adaptable. But you need to be specific in the adaptations you want to elicit from your body.

Think of a marathon runner and a 100m sprinter. What do they spend most of their time doing?

The marathon runner does mostly low & slow, the sprinter does mostly hard & fast. Go figure. They don’t float around the middle.

Also it’s important to note that this is brutal work. Very tough physically & mentally. I dread it.

But that’s the whole point: you can’t become a beast without going through this.

It will make you more resilient on all fronts.

There are many options for the explosive repeats, but the main two are:

  • assault bike
  • running sprints

I use the assault bike. I have noticed the rogue bike is tougher than other assault bikes too, so be aware of that.

A huge part of being ‘fit’ and having good cardio, is your ability to recover.

Once you can do many explosive repeats and recover quickly, you know you are becoming much fitter.

An easy way to know that someone isn’t very fit: when they can’t get their heart rate back down after an explosive sprint.

Bigger Engine, Beast Power

If you focus on building:

  • a bigger engine with the low & slow aerobic work
  • repeatable power with hard & fast explosive repeats.

You will have beast level cardio in time.

Not only will you perform better in your chosen sport & activities, but you will live a longer, healthier life.

A worthy endeavor for every human.

If you need help adding effective cardio into your training, send me a DM on Instagram, or an email to guywhodidntsettle@gmail.com

Don’t Settle,
Mark

How to Cultivate the Don’t Settle Attitude

Settling saves you the uncomfortable pain of failure & rejection in the short term.

That’s why most people settle.

But what they don’t realise, is that you are only setting yourself up to be hit with an avalanche of regret one day. Something much worse.

I’ll never forget the day it happened to me.

Sitting in the airport with an ex. Eating a meal waiting for our flight. I was maybe 24.

I stopped watching soccer when I settled & quit on my own dream of making it one day.

Never realising that part of it was because I couldn’t face what was reflected back at me through the screen: I gave up on myself.

But a soccer match was on in this airport restaurant. Cool, I’ll watch it.

And who do I see on the screen? Daryl Horgan. A lad I used to play with on the Emerging Talent Program in Castlebar for 2 years.

He made it. He’s living my dream.

I couldn’t explain what happened to me at the time. But in hindsight I see that I was forced to face the pain I had buried deep down for a long time.

The pain of settling.

I felt sick and couldn’t eat anymore. I felt overwhelmed. I wanted to go home.

I was ashamed of myself. At the first big roadblock I just gave up on myself and settled. I didn’t even try my best.

I never had regrets walking off the soccer pitch, as I gave my all until the final whistle.

But off the pitch, I couldn’t do the same.

I didn’t make the Ireland team after 2 years on the Emerging Talent Program. So close but yet so far. But I was still only 18 at the time.

Roy Keane didn’t make it early, Jamie Vardy didn’t. So many players missed the first boat to becoming a professional soccer player, but they didn’t settle and made it through other avenues.

Now, after cultivating the don’t settle attitude in my life, I back up my aspirations with my actions.

I don’t settle, I give it my all, and the cards fall as they may.

I am proud of myself regardless of the outcome. The most empowering, meaningful way to live in my experience.

Zero regrets. Zero guilt or shame. With self-respect, passion & purpose in abundance.

But back then I didn’t have this attitude. I was all fluff. Wishful thinking. I said things but didn’t back them up.

I talked about how I would defer my first year of college and move to England. Play in the lower leagues and try to get scouted.

What’s a year out of college anyway? It’ll be there when I get back. At least if I go and give it one full year, I’ll have no regrets then.

This is what I told some people close to me, but I did f**k all about it.

In that moment in the airport where all this past pain was brought up from my subconscious, my ex saw something was wrong and asked was I ok.

“………I’m fine”. I couldn’t say another word or I’d have burst into tears.

Like most men, I hid and buried it as much as I could. And just got on with life.

I wasn’t self-aware, I couldn’t handle my emotions, and I lived in this mental prison.

I guess some people just have what it takes, and I’m not one of them.

The Mental Freedom work changed my life here, and I see it all clearly now.

But when I gave up on my soccer dream back then, the don’t settle attitude I only had on the pitch now vanished completely.

I fell into the victim mentality life.

Victim Mentality

The victim mentality permeates our society.

It’s the default.

Go for your dreams?! Nah. Be realistic.

Have high standards and strive for the life you want? Discard the soul sucking 9-5 life to try and carve your own path of passion & purpose?

Pfff. Go to college. Get a real job.

Take up martial arts after your body is already in bits from trying to be a professional athlete?

Nah man, you crazy?! Your body can’t do that anymore. It’s over. Time to settle.

You know you’ll just be disappointed right?! Better to lower your expectations and fall in line. Who are you to think you can do that anyway?

It’s crabs in a bucket. And the crabs aren’t even aware.

They live the settling life, so they want you to as well. It makes them feel better.

Why should you be afraid of adhering to this settling society?

Because settling destroys your soul.

Settling is the graveyard for dreams and the fertile land for regret.

You become a shadow of who you know you could be.

The only way out is to start cultivating the don’t settle attitude.

The Don’t Settle Attitude 

“You don’t get what you deserve, you get what you settle for”

When I was in my own pain cave, in the height of my victim mentality, I learned life’s biggest lesson.

I thought I was a good person. I try to do the right thing. So why has my life turned out this way?!

Why couldn’t my dreams come true?

Why do I have to retire from sport at 25?! It’s been my whole life. That’s all I cared about.

Wtf am I meant to do now? Take up water polo with the elderly?! And pretend to be happy?

The hope for life I had, the exciting possibilities of the future, they are all gone.

I don’t want the normal life, I don’t fit in. It’s not for me. It never will be.

Why don’t bad things happen to rapists, murderers and terrorists instead?!

I’ve been stuck in these loops like we all have. Where we position ourselves as the victim of our own story that we have made up in our head.

My own physical freedom journey made me face the harsh truth. The one that sparked the don’t settle attitude within me, which has defined the last 8 years of my life.

“You don’t get what you deserve, you get what you settle for.”

That’s it. That’s life explained in one sentence.

It doesn’t matter if you deserve to be forced to retire from chronic pain & injury. What matters is are you going to settle for that?

F**k that, I’m coming back. That was my answer.

I knew that pain of giving up on my soccer career, I learned that one the hard way. I swore I would never make the same mistake again.

At at the second defining moment of my life, I made the right choice. The one I knew I wanted in my heart.

F**k the experts, I don’t want to settle. I’m gona come back or die trying.

This is the attitude you need to have if you want to regain your physical freedom. Or for anything else in life.

There are 3 steps to go from the victimhood mentality to the don’t settle attitude:

1) The Pain Cave
2) Extreme Ownership
3) Becoming the Hero

Let’s dive in.

1) The Pain Cave

For any change to occur, there needs to be a certain level of pain to motivate us to change.

That’s how we are evolutionarily wired:

  • When will you go hunt for food? When you have the pain of starvation
  • When will you change your unsocial behaviour? When the pain of violence/shame/humiliation from your village is too much for you

It’s the same in modern life today:

  • When will you look for a new job? When the pain of dealing with your boss becomes unbearable
  • When will you look for a new partner? When the pain of your current partner (or lonliness from the lack of one) is too much

We think pain is bad, but it’s good. It’s necessary.

Pain is the most potent catalyst to make changes in your life.

The pain cave is where the alchemy happens. Where the transformation starts to take place.

You may have been a different person before your own personal pain cave, but you will not be the same when you emerge.

Look at the before & after for clients in the Physical Freedom Program. Look at the pain they needed to make a change.

Jack always springs to my mind when I talk about this topic.

He went to many physios & consultants after a car accident. Diagnosed with bulging discs, osteoporosis & degenerative disc disease. And it scared the life out of him as everyone told him he was too young to have these issues.

When he couldn’t tie his shoes the day after games or get up to the printer at work, he was forced to settle and retire from Gaelic in his early 20s.

But this pain is what eventually enabled him to take ownership. It was the catalyst.

It ignited the path for Jack to take ownership of his body, and work on regaining physical freedom to get back playing championship football in Kerry.

2) Extreme Ownership

When you make it out of the pain cave, you will have a new realisation:

Everything in your life is down to you.

Instead of:

  • Blaming healthcare practitioners for not ‘fixing’ you
  • Blaming society for you being unhappy
  • Blaming your ex for all your problems

You start to look at the world differently now.

You take ownership of your life.

You take responsibility for your part in every experience.

And you start to realise that this is the route forward to changing your life.

How? Because:

  • Taking ownership -> taking control
  • Taking control -> can make changes
  • Making changes -> changes the outcome

When you extrapolate this out over time, it’s inevitable that your life will change for the better.

It also shows how not taking ownership ensures that your life will never change:

  • If you don’t take ownership -> you blame others & give them control
  • You have no have control -> you are a victim and can’t change
  • Can’t make changes now -> so the outcome won’t change

Reading “Extreme Ownership” from Jocko Willink instilled this perspective in me.

I saw how the victim mentality nearly ruined his military career.

A mission went sideways and Jocko was leading it. His subordinates didn’t follow orders, made mistakes, and now his head was on the chopping block.

He had to brief his boss on what happened. He was going to blame all who let him down. Pick out the culprits who cost him the mission. But this is where he had his epiphany.

I’m the leader, so I’m the one in charge. The buck stops with me.

Any fault of theirs is a fault of mine.
It’s a lack of leadership skills on my part.
I need to take ownership of this.

Instead of going in with his original victim mentality plan of blaming his team, he went in with:

  • Humility
  • An analysis of his shortcomings as a leader
  • A plan to rectify this and become better

To his surprise, he wasn’t fired.

Taking ownership didn’t just keep Jocko his job, but this new attitude enabled him to climb the ranks and become a decorated Navy Seal Veteran. Comanding Task Unit Bruiser, the most highly decorated special operations unit of the Iraq war.

Why should you care about war?

As Jocko says: war is just life amplified & intensified.

The life lessons we can skip over in life, can’t be avoided in war. You have to face them.

Jocko taught me that you are the leader of your own life, whether you like it or not. You are responsible for where you are in life. Always. 

Nobody is coming to save you, it’s down to you. Same in war, same for us civilians.

Taking extreme ownership of your life is the first point of changing it.

You are where you are now because of you and nobody else. Because of the decisions you have made up to now.

This can be one of the most painful things to hear and accept, but on the other side is the most liberating feeling you will experience.

If you take ownership of your past, you take ownership of your future.

Now you can start making new decisions.

Now you can start to become the hero of your own life.

3) Become the Hero

“When you find yourself in a room surrounded by your enemies, you should tell yourself, ‘I am not locked in here with you, you are locked in here with me!’. This is the kind of mindset you should have if you want to succeed in life. Get rid of that victim mentality” – Bruce Lee

There are 3 archetypes we play out in life.

The victim, the villain, & the hero.

We start as the helpless victim.
Graduating to the villain.
Then if we mature enough, we become the hero.

I’ve been through all stages.

I lived the victim mentality life. Giving up on my hopes and dreams. On myself. On who I knew I could be.

I’ve took ownership and became the villain. A fuck the world mentality and putting myself above everything for the first time in my life.

A chip on my shoulder, fueled by suppressed anger & pain.

And I’ve come full circle to becoming the hero I always wanted to be.

Not settling & living true to myself. Being the change I want to see in the world.

Small gaining my way towards my potential, and inspiring & educating others to do the same.

You are in one of these 3 stages now.

Are you going to retreat or rise?

Retreat or Rise

“It’s not who I am underneath, but what I do that defines me” – Batman

Realise all the possibilities in front of you with the right attitude.

Whether you are the victim, villain or hero is a choice, not a predetermined destiny.

You are choosing to be where you are.
(consciously or subconsciously)

Even if you think and talk like the hero, but are still playing the victim or villain.

I lived that batman quote through telling people I would chase my soccer dream but did nothing about it. And you are probably doing the same in your own way.

Becoming aware of this dynamic gives you the opportunity to make a change for the better.

You CHOOSE to be the hero. 

I used to always look at movie characters for inspiration. Ancient legends, modern warriors.

Who do I look at now too? Me.

I inspire myself. And that’s where you want to get too. That’s when you know you have becme the hero of your own life.

Some will hate, some will be inspired. But you know the real reward and when you are being the hero:

When you are proud of yourself.
When you have gained your own self-respect.
When you inspire the f**k out of younger you.

Seeing the impact not settling & living true to myself has to inspire others lights me up like nothing else.

I’ve been in many tides that have lifted me and still am.

My aim is to be the tide that lifts you.

If you cultivate the don’t settle attitude, you can become the hero of your own life in time.

I’ll believe in you until you can believe in yourself.

Don’t Settle,
Mark

Whenever you’re ready, there are 3 ways I can help you:

1) Physical Freedom Program:

  • My 1:1 coaching program on how to overcome chronic pain & injury, and reach your athletic potential
  • I have worked with 100s of clients, across 37 different sports/activities, over 3 separate continents. Covering injuries to all joints in the human body
  • Join those not settling for their movement limitations here

2) Mental Freedom Course

  • My self-awareness course that teaches you how to stop looping & suffering, and skillfully navigate your own mind
  • Most people are a slave to their subconscious, constantly playing out the same undesirable patterns in their life
  • Here you will understand why you are the way you are, and how to break free to become who you always wanted to be

3) Lifestyle Design University

  • From must €49, you can have the blueprint to design the life true to yourself
  • You will learn how to create a vision, how to use my self-development system, and how to move the levers to freedom which close the gap towards the life you want
  • Now you will avoid the biggest regret of humanity in the process: “not living a life true to myself, living the life others expected of me”

Diagnoses Are Not A Death Sentence

This conversation came up with a client this week.

The dreaded diagnosis.

When you are told what’s ‘wrong’ with your body. Delivered a cause for all your issues in a nice neat diagnosis shaped package.

These diagnoses usually end up becoming a death sentence.

That make us believe we can’t overcome chronic pain & injury and reach our athletic potential unless we ‘fix’ it.

Then we get stuck on the roundabout of injuries & average progress chasing fixes to different diagnoses for years.

And if the ‘fixes’ don’t work, then the journey is over. Your story stops here.

I’ve worked with hundreds of clients, and a lot of them have received certain ‘diagnosis’. The one that always pops into my mind when I talk about this topic is Jack.

A lad in his early 20’s who was in a car crash. Just feel how afraid he was, as he describes the healthcare route’s approach to helping him overcome chronic pain & injury to return to Gaelic:

“I had been struggling with injuries the previous 2 years after a car accident. I spent a lot of time on physio tables and meeting consultants trying to solve my issues but with no sustainable success. I was diagnosed with bulging discs, osteoporosis and degenerative disc disease and this scared the life out of me as everyone I spoke with said I was too young to have these issues”

You can read Jack’s inspiring journey of not settling, and regaining his Physical Freedom to play championship football in Kerry here. 

Just like I would have explained to Jack at the start, these diagnoses don’t have to be a death sentence. You don’t have to settle for that ending.

Diagnoses As A Death Sentence

Here’s how it usually goes:

We go to ‘experts’ and get ‘diagnosed’. We get told what’s ‘wrong’ with our bodies. And what we need to ‘fix’ it. Or that it can’t be fixed at all.

This leads us to believe that we are like a computer with broken parts. We just need this ‘fix’, and then we will be brand new. Or else we are f***ed.

Like humpty dumpty who fell off the wall. Glue him back together, or throw him away.

This right here IS the problem.

You are led to believe that your body is like a computer or a car that can be broken and fixed, but in reality this is not how your body works at all.

Diagnosis are just a snapshot in time of what someone ‘thinks’ is an issue with your body.

It’s like someone saying a photograph of your past will define your future.

But that’s not the case, because we are constantly changing as you will see in this newsletter.

These diagnosis lead to a distortion in your thinking which messes everything up going forward. And prevents you from getting on the road back to your Physical Freedom.

This false view of the body bestowed upon us by (a lot of) the healthcare ‘experts’, lead to a myriad of issues:

  • False beliefs about the human body (which keeps us in the dark about the truth, and hence we’ll always be fooled)
  • Nocebo effect (opposite of placebo – which links to increased pain levels)
  • Traps us in a prison where we are searching for the wrong answer (so we will never get the result we want)
  • Takes the locus of control away from us, and puts them in control (hence you need to rely on them forever to ‘fix’ you)

And where does this lead?

For me, it led to looking for the fix for my multiple diagnosis for 10 years, which never happened.

I would go to a different healthcare practitioner thinking they have the ‘fix’, to only be given a new diagnosis. Another thing ‘wrong’ with my body.

The goalposts kept moving. And the cycle went on and on. Like chasing down a mirage in the desert.

It took getting 5 different ‘diagnoses’ from 5 different ‘experts’, for the penny to drop for me.

I had told all 5 the EXACT same issues, but yet they all gave me a different diagnosis. It didn’t make any sense.

This is when I started thinking critically for the first time in my life with my body, instead of blindly following the ‘experts’.

If they really did know what was going on, then they would have all diagnosed me with the same thing wouldn’t they?!

But not even 2 of the 5 diagnoses were the same. It was like throwing darts at a dart board. The Russian roulette of quick fixes.

This was when I had a huge realisation which is very important to understand. It changed my body and life forever.

All anyone can tell you, is their opinion based on their education & experience.

That’s it. Me included.

It doesn’t matter if they have 10 doctorates or haven’t a single qualification, all anyone can give you is their opinion. Their hypothesis. Based on their education & experience.

Diagnosis aren’t divine answers of truth for your destiny, they are just opinions.

People have different education, and people have different experience. And through this combination they will have different opinions.

This explains how an osteopath gave me a different diagnosis than a physio (different education). And it also explains how 2 physio’s can still give me a different diagnosis (different experience).

The whole allure of the ‘experts’ was now shattered for me forever. I finally took them down off the pedestal society put them on.

I could see behind the veil now. The mirage was gone like a puff of smoke. And hopefully it is now for you too.

Then I went looking for better answers. One’s that actually made logical sense.

Like last week’s newsletter on how to not be fooled, I started from first principles.

Reasoning from first principles removes the impurities of assumptions and conventions.

(i.e lets you see through the bullshit and find the truth)

I took ownership of my body for the first time in my life, instead of outsourcing it to the experts.

I followed the results, over doctorates & degrees.

And this is when things finally started to change for me.

Through this new approach free of dogma and falsity, I ended up going to a mobility coach who had no ‘formal’ education on the human body. No doctorate on the wall.

He helped me more with my chronic back pain in 1 month, than 10 years down the healthcare route with the most ‘qualified’ people I could find.

I knew I was finally on the right path after so much pain & heartbreak. I felt it in my soul. And I had the results to prove it now.

From then on, I only follow the results.

Who actually cares if someone has 10 pieces of paper hanging on their wall or none? As long as they help you get the results you want?

So if we aren’t like a computer, like a car, like humpty dumpty. If we aren’t broken and then fixed, how does the human body work then?

Let’s get to the truth.

Your Body Is An Adaptable Organism

Humans don’t have ‘fixed’ states, we constantly adapt to whatever environment we are in:

  • If you start climbing hills, your body will adapt and become more cadiovascularly fit.
  • If you start lifting rocks outside or iron in the gym, your body will adapt and become stronger.
  • If you start sitting all day and push through injuries, your body will negatively adapt and become tight & stiff

We adapt to our environment and change in ways that make us more likely to survive.

This is how the human body works. Diving into evolutionary biology showed me this truth.

Humans have been here for around 6 million years. The species of humans that you, I, and the whole world are: is homo-sapiens.

There were others species of humans just like cats & dogs, but they all died off. For the last 200,000 years, there have only been us homo-sapiens.

Over all these 200,000 years, the human body has adapted to its environment.

That is what we are designed to do: to adapt to our environment to help us survive & reproduce and keep the species living on.

If we weren’t adaptable and constantly changing, then we simply wouldn’t be here.

Homo-sapiens would have become extinct like all the other species that have.

EVERYTHING we have now in terms of our body, was chosen through natural selection because it had an advantage in keeping us alive:

  • The shape of your nose
  • your eyebrows
  • the fact we walk on 2 feet
  • our ability to think abstractly
  • our cardiovascular endurance
  • our ability to sweat to cool down so we can endurance hunt animals that overheat with their fur

You could go through it all.

The point here is the human body is always adapting. It’s always changing.

It has been for the last 200,000 years, and it will be until our extinction.

The irony is that we think we ‘can’t change’ (i.e my hip mobility is terrible, I can’t change. I’ve always been tight and stiff etc).

But in reality, you are changing everyday.

It’s literally the opposite of what you are led to believe with these diagnoses.

Yes you may have a certain issues/injuries, but you will continue to change into the future. It’s not a dead end.

I always like to bring the high level theory down to the practical. And it comes down to 2 paths here.

1) You are either adapting & changing POSITIVELY
(i.e slowly becoming more mobile)

OR

2) You are adapting & changing NEGATIVELY
(i.e slowly becoming tighter and stiffer).

This is all happening slowly. Each and every day in the background. But you just don’t realise it.

It’s only after an accumulation of years/decades, that all these (negative) small gains have added up to the (negative) big gain.

And now you feel like the tin man looking for the fix.

But you are blind to the actual problem. The problem wasn’t ‘your’ body like you are told by the healthcare ‘experts’.

The problem was your lack of education on how your own body actually works.

You can’t stop the small gains. You can’t stop our body from adapting to our environment.

The small gains are constantly working either FOR or AGAINST you. You decide.

You can focus on what’s in your control. You can work on building a resilient body.

People who are unaware of what I have explained:

  • continue to sit most the day
  • with no focus on mobility
  • while hammering themselves with sport

….and end up adapting negatively, thinking they are broken.

People who are aware of what I have explained:

  • have movement snacks throughout the day
  • focus on a mobility plan for their movement limitations
  • check the ego and just do what they can until they prepare their body to handle the demands of their sport

….and end up adapting positively. Empowered by understanding the truth about the amazing adaptability of the human body.

Your Body Is Always On A Journey

Think of how your body adapts and changes every day like a car journey.

You HAVE to go on the journey. You can’t stop the car.

If you can’t stop the car, and you are forced to go on a journey, what can you do?

You can decide what direction the car goes. This is in your control.

Do you want to end up somewhere in 10 years that you hate?
(not able to do sports you love/unable to play with your kids)

Or do you want to arrive somewhere you love.
(regain physical freedom and keep it as you age)

I know you would pick option 2 there. But what are you probably doing?

Sleeping in the backseat of the car. Not even aware that you are on a journey.

The driver is on the route towards tin man city and you are in the backseat oblivious to the pain and suffering coming your way. You have no idea the destination you will arrive at.

It’s only when you get there 10 years later, that you realise your mistake. “Driver can you fix this and bring me back instantly please?!”

Doesn’t work that way. You can drive, but you can’t teleport to a different destination overnight.

Your past decisions got you here, but your future decisions can get you out of it.

Once you are educated on how your body works, you know better. You are empowered.

You wake up from your slumber of ignorance in the back seat. You tell the driver to pull the car over.

You kick that motherf***er out of the car like you’re playing GTA, and YOU take the wheel.

You are in control of the car journey. You are the captain now.
You decide where this car will end up in 1,2,5,10,20 years.
You decide how your body will adapt and change going forward.

It doesn’t matter how far you have drove in the wrong direction. I went 10 years in the wrong direction. Jack and most of my clients spent years/decades going in the wrong direction too.

All that matters is now.

That you make the decision to get on the right path.

As a previous business mentor told me – “every breath is a chance to start again”.

Your future self will thank you. Your future family will thank you.

Why do I make all this content?

Because I finally found the motorway to physical freedom, but I see so many people on the other side of the motorway towards tin man city. I feel for them.

They have no idea where they are heading. I try to tell people but they are blaring the same old tune so loud they can’t even hear me. Nothing I say will help them.

So I try to set up my own communication channels. I put out info on a radio station that each car can choose to listen to. And if they do, I can change their path and their life trajectory.

If they choose to listen and implement what I’m telling them, they can turn off the motorway to tin man city, and take the ramp towards physical freedom.

There are 6 lanes but not many cars. There’s room for us all but barely anyone knows about it.

They don’t even know their body is on a journey.

They think their diagnoses are a death sentence.

They are still out there looking for the ‘fix’.

Don’t Settle,
Mark

3 Different Ways I Can Help You

1) Physical Freedom Program

  • My 1:1 coaching program on how to overcome chronic pain & injury, and reach your athletic potential
  • I have worked with 100s of clients, across 37 different sports/activities, over 3 separate continents. Covering injuries to all joints in the human body
  • Join those not settling for their movement limitations here

2) Mental Freedom Course

  • My self-awareness course that teaches you how to stop looping & suffering, and skillfully navigate your own mind
  • Most people are a slave to their subconscious, constantly playing out the same undesirable patterns in their life
  • Here you will understand why you are the way you are, and how to break free to become who you always wanted to be

3Lifestyle Design University

  • From must €49, you can have the blueprint to design the life true to yourself
  • You will learn how to create a vision, how to use my self-development system, and how to move the levers to freedom which close the gap towards the life you want
  • Now you will avoid the biggest regret of humanity in the process: “not living a life true to myself, living the life others expected of me”

How to Find Your Passion & Purpose

I’ve never felt normal. I always felt different.
 
As a young kid, all the way up until my early 20s when I eventually dove into self awareness & self development.
 
Everything started to finally make sense for me then.
 
I first did the Myers Briggs personality test, and saw that I was an INFJ, one of the rarest of the personality types (roughly 2% of the world. Nicknamed “the Advocate” or “the “Counsellor”).
 
The type most prone to feeling misunderstood and different. Ok so I’m not alone! Something I wish I had known sooner.
 
Reading this and so much more was very insightful to me at the time. I felt like someone was describing me better than I could have explained it myself. I finally felt heard. I finally felt seen.
 
The line of “advocates are troubled by injustice” really hit home too. One of my earliest memories was crying to my mam when I found out Jesus died for me when I was around 4!
 
My life was like a jigsaw puzzle that didn’t make sense, but now pieces were finally starting to come together.
 
Years later when I finally did the Mental Freedom work (LINK), I got the bird eye view of the puzzle, and my whole life finally made sense. It changed my life forever.
 
For those who feel called, click that link and read about how you can do the same.
 
People wondered how I could leave my safe, pensionable, well paid job in Facebook to follow my passion & purpose of becoming a coach. To go on my mission to help people regain their physical freedom.
 
But they didn’t understand it literally wasn’t a choice for me, it was a moral obligation at that point in my life.
 
I couldn’t have lived with myself otherwise. I had to fight for what I believed in. That’s the only avenue that would let me live with no regrets.
 
Humans all run from fear, but we have different ones.
 
Most run from the fear of no money, safety or status. My biggest fear was not living true to myself.
 
This is actually the biggest recorded regret of humanity on their deathbeds. I just realised this earlier in life from giving up on my soccer career and living with that pain & regret.
 
I promised myself when the next passion rolled around, I would go all in. And I did.
 
But how did I find my passion and purpose in helping people overcome chronic pain & injury specifically?
 
I thought I would be a soccer player so I had never planned for anything else. Never envisioned myself being anything else.
 
And from being a shy, introverted, embarassed kid, the last thing I thought I would be doing is becoming a coach and sharing my life to try & inspire others!
 
I even remember an old friend from school seeing my IG page recently and being like wtf?! He said he never thought I’d be doing this. I replied me and you both! It’s funny how life goes.
 
But from looking back and doing deep dive reflections on my path, I have a blueprint to follow for those like the younger me.
 
Those who are unhappy with their life.
Those who know they are heading for regrets on their deathbed.
Those who don’t want to settle any longer.
Those who want more passion & purpose in their life.
 

The Blind Leading the Blind

 
If you are someone who has a deep sense that you need to follow your passion & purpose, you probably struggle to know what that is.
 
That was me too. Why?
 
Because we follow the path of those who aren’t optimising for passion & purpose.
 
The mainstream societal path ultimately optimises for safety:
  • Go to school
  • Go to college
  • Get a well paid career. A safe pensionable job
  • Get married & a mortgage
  • Retire at 65
And only then can you follow your passions and whats true to you. It’s unrealistic & dangerous to think otherwise.
 
That it the underlying belief of mainstream society.
 
So don’t be surprised anymore if you follow that route and aren’t filled with passion & purpose. It’s not optimising for that.
 
You are probably safe, so it served its purpose.
 
To me it’s backwards. I wanted to optimise for integrity & finding my passion & purpose.
 
So to imagine that I would postpone it all until I’m 65 years old, and waste the best years of my life for safety?! Nah fuck that. Not for me thanks.
 
I personally don’t agree with the retirement model as a way to live my life, and it wasn’t the path I was going to follow.
 
I will write a separate newsletter about how to build cast iron commitment. In your vision. In yourself.
 
But for this newsletter, we will stick with how I actually found my passion & purpose.
 
I didn’t know what I was doing at the time. I was stumbling forward as best I could.
 
But in hindsight, there are a few key things I would tell my younger self to give him clarity & accelerate his journey.
 

You Don’t ‘Find’ Passion & Purpose, You Cultivate It

 
Read that 5 times and etch it into your brain.
 
As this is the first roadblock that stops most people. One I struggled with for a long time too.
 
You don’t ‘find’ your passion & purpose, you cultivate it.
 
Are you seeing the same trends yet? The same issues holding people back in most of life’s big problems?
  • Chronic pains and injuries
  • Not living a life true to themselves (don’t know their passion/purpose)
  • Can’t find their ‘one true love’
They all are linked with the same foundation of illusion. The idea that you will just ‘find’ it. That there is a quick fix out there waiting for you.
 
The illusion that will keep you chasing your tail and never find the answer.
 
You don’t just find these things one day. Constantly searching for it is actually part of what creates separation from it.
 
Understand that there is no end, only evolution.
 
You look for the safety of the comfort zone. If I just find my passion, my partner, my fix for my chronic pains, then everything will be ok. But it’s an illusion.
 
– A relationship is a lifelong process that evolves & changes over time
– Your passion is a lifelong process that evolves & changes over time
– Looking after your body is a lifelong process that evolves & changes over time
 
You are focused on these imaginary goalposts that don’t even exist. A mirage of the mind.
 
The reality is that you cultivate passion & purpose over time:
  • You don’t ‘FIND’ your passion/purpose like a toy in a cereal box one day.
  • The FIX to your chronic pains & injuries doesn’t arrive one night like a deliveroo
  • The juliet to your romeo isn’t just out there waiting for you
The flaw here is that we are conditioned by society to believe that the the answer is outside of oursevles. That it is outside of our control.
 
This is not true and massively disempowering.
 
It’s the path to an unhappy life, constantly waiting for something that is never going to arrive.
  • There is no ‘fix’ for chronic pains and injuries, you need to follow the process of education & coaching & priotising your body over time
  • There is no one ‘perfect partner’ out there for you. There are many potential matches based on your template installed in your as a child of what love is to you. Every person that you end up in a relationship with ARE your ‘soulmate’. But just some are not your preference
  • There is no one passion & purpose out there for you to find. You cultivate passion & purpose over time by understanding more about yourself and the impact you want to have on the world. And this passion/purpose will evolve and change over time as you grow & learn more about yourself
Drop the illusion that everything is outside of yourself.
 
That you need saving, that you need to find X,Y,Z to be happy.
 
There is no light at the end of that tunnel.
 
Now that we have faced the harsh truth, the path for true progress has opened up.
 
If you want to understand something, you need to define it.
 
The first step to finding your passion is actually understand what the word passion means. It’s origin in this world.
 
And you’ll see how it’s nothing like this esoteric illusion we are sold in the mainstream.
 
1) Passion = Suffering
 
Passion comes from the latin word “passio”, which means suffering.
 
To have ‘passion’ for something, actually means that you are willing to suffer for it.
 
Oh how much sense this made to me once I learned this in a book called ‘The Passion Paradox’.
 
It originates all the way back from “the passion of the christ”. Jesus had ‘passion’ for us because he was willing to suffer for us.
 
He put it all on the line. He didn’t just metaphorically ‘die on the hill’ for what he believed in, he physically did.
 
That is what passion is: your willingness to suffer for what you believe in.
 
Passion isn’t:
  • something you do when things are good
  • something fun that you drop when things get hard.
  • something you find this year and throw away next year
Passion is something you care enough about that you are willing to suffer for it through the ups and downs. Passion is something you stay committed to.
 
Not what you thought was it eh?
 
Not the fluffy, warm, view of your yacht in the harbour beside your mansion that you get once you ‘find your passion’.
 
This is the origin of passion, but the romanticism period changed its meaning. It was Shakespeare who first used the word ‘passion’ in terms of romance, and it took off from there and evolved into this distorted view we have today.
 
Disney movies for example showing us how the one will sweep us off our feet. The knight in shining armour will save the day. How our dream job is out there waiting for us.
 
It’s the quick fix hack we are all drawn to in any area of life. The illusion humans can’t resist.
 
It’s the idea that we can get the results without doing the work, which is most people’s dream.
 
But that’s not reality. The sooner you wake up to this the better. If it sounds too good to be true, it usually is.
 
I realised why I had been successful to some degree when I was reading this book. I was so ‘passionate’ about getting people their physical freedom back, because I was willing to die on that hill.
 
I left my safe, pensionable Facebook job saving 2k a month for this. I was willing to, and have, put it all on the line to make it happen.
 
I am willing to suffer for it. Just like Jesus on the cross. This is my cross to bear. We each have our own.
 
I will write a newsletter on ‘how to turn your passion to your career’, as you need to do in with a smart strategy.
 
Or else you will more than likely be in the 95% percent who are out of business in the first 3 years, and crawl back to the 9-5 with your tail between your legs.
 
By the end of this year I’ll be 5 years in business. And we are just getting started.
 
2) Try More Shit
 
I followed Gary Vee for years when I had no clue what I wanted to do with my life.
 
I found him very inspiring as he’s all about following what’s true to yourself over the normal college & 9-5 route.
 
That was resonating with me as I felt lost at 23 when I had just finished college and returned home from a J1:
  • With a broken body from chronic pain & injury
  • Hiding behind a mask not being my true self
  • In 4k of debt and no progress in any area of life I wanted
  • No clue of my passion/purpose after failing as a soccer player
I came across his video where a college graduate was asking him “how do I find my passion?”.
 
Gary: what have you tried?
College kid: ehh…..my college course (accounting we’ll say)
Gary: and do you like it?
College kid: no
Gary: okkkkk……so what else have you tried?
College kid: ……….ehh……nothing really?….
Gary: so you have tried ONE THING….and didn’t like it…….and you are here crying to me that you haven’t found your passion??
College kid:……ehh yeah I guess (realising how ridiculous and entitled that sounds)
Gary: TRY MORE SHIT. You need to get out there and try more things!! You have tried literally one thing and didn’t like it……how are you meant to know what you like if you don’t try other things?! you’re fricken 22 years old!! you are SO YOUNG. You could spend the next 8 years trying other things and you are still only 30. You have another 30/40 years to work. If you keep trying until 40, you still have another 20/30. YOU GOT TIME.
College kid: ….yeah cool thanks man. (completely uplifted)
 
That hit me like a right hook.
 
I was like holy shit, I have literally tried 2 or 3 things, and I’m sitting here like that kid being like ”I can’t find my passion”.
 
Gary Vee gave me the reality check I needed. The harsh truth that snapped me out of the society induced entitlement.
 
Thinking it will land on my lap like everything does these days with instant gratification.
 
I needed to try more shit.
 
If you have not found something you are passionate and willing to suffer for yet, you need to:
  • Try more shit
  • Do more of what you like
  • Do less of what you don’t
By following this very simple advice, it will close the doors to things you realise you don’t want to do anymore, and open ones to things you want to try.
 
That was Garys advice, so that’s what I did. I followed the results to see where it would take me.
 
Through this strategy, you will find over time that you will start to identify the sparks.
 
3) Follow The Sparks
 
One of the things I decided to try with my new approach was Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu.
 
I had done 3 mixed martial arts classes in college. I remember thinking that I didn’t really like the boxing, but the stuff on the ground was pretty cool and fun.
 
With college life and drinking as the priority back then, I never went back after the 3 classes.
 
But through analysing the ‘shit’ I had tried in my life, I could see that Jiu-Jitsu was a small spark for sure. Cool, lets try it again and see if that spark turns into a flame or if it dies out.
 
I looked up some Jiu Jitsu gyms in Dublin and went into a few asking for information. A friend happened to be going to one near where I lived so I ended up joining there. (Brazier Jiu-Jitsu)
 
Within a few months I knew I would do this for life. That spark had turned into a passion.
 
I was willing to suffer on the mats to learn the skills physically & mentally that were improving my life.
 
Over 5 years later, I’m a purple belt in the same gym. I will do Jiu Jitsu for life. And I am in the process of helping with the coaching in the club.
 
What else had I a spark for? The human body.
 
There is a gap in the ‘starting Jiu-Jitsu again’ story to the purple belt. I had so much chronic pain during and after class that I had to stop. I took a full year out as a white belt to try and sort these issues.
 
It got so bad that I had to stop Jiu-Jitsu & the gym. Depressing as I had just found something I finally had passion for again after soccer, but now my body wasn’t capable of doing it.
 
At 25, it looked like my athletic pursuits could be over. For someone who has been an athlete all of my life up to that point, I just couldn’t comprehend this fate.
 
I couldn’t settle for that life. I’m afraid of the man I would become.
 
This was the origin of my physical freedom journey and the guywhodidntsettle story. (watch the documentary here).
 
I had 2 choices:
  • I could either become obsessed with the body and figure out a way back
  • Stay retired forever & filled with regret for the rest of my life
After having the pain of giving up on my soccer career in recent memory, and the thoughts of my life not involving sports & activities I love, the biggest passion of my life started.
 
This was it, the first time in my life that I committed to not settling.
 
The first time in my life as a man that I finally planted my flag and committed to it at all costs. No matter the obstacles, no matter the outcome.
 
All the experts & odds are against me, but IDGAF. I will get mobile or die tryin’.
 
And since you know what passion is now (willing to suffer for something), I couldn’t have been more passionate.
 
I still remember the moment where learning about the human body went from a necessary passion for me, to a passion I might pursue outside of myself to help others.
 
I was in my sitting room at home googling things on the body & mobility. One led to the next, and to the next. I was there for hours. I couldn’t tell you how long.
 
Time disappeared. It went into the night. I felt so in the moment, captivated by every word I was reading. It’s only when I came out of this flow zone, that I knew the body is another passion of mine.
 
Now you can see how ‘trying more shit’and ‘following the sparks’ led me to some passions.
 
Two of the many sparks I followed, had started to turn into small flames: Jiu-Jitsu & mobility training.
 
Through this process, I ended up with a final spark: evolutionary biology.
 
I read a book called ‘The Story of the Human Body” by Daniel Lieberman.
 
That book blew my mind and changed my life.
 
I had never looked at the human body or our species in the same way since. Information from this books underpins one of the education modules in the Physical Freedom Program (LINK)
 
It’s documents how the body evolved over 6 millions years of evolution to where we are today. How most of the biggest issues in the world today are ‘mismatch diseases’, aka us humans living in a modern environment we are not adapted to live in at all.
 
Cardiovascular diseases (the biggest killer in the world), chronic back pain (the biggest chronic pain in the world), anxiety/depression. All these things were man-made. They never existed in the hunter-gatherer days.
 
I could see the whole bigger picture of why I was in chronic pain and the route out. I could see why so many things were happening and the way out for all of them. That book changed the trajectory of my life.
 
Now we had a 3rd passion: Evolutionary biology/psychology.
 
So my 3 sparks turned to flames over time were:
 
1) Jiu-Jitsu
2) Mobility training
3) Evolutionary biology/psychology
 
I remember thinking “yeah thats great and all, but how do I make money off this?! How do I make this my career?! It’s just random shit.
 
But in Gary Vee’s video, he had already addressed this point. He said you don’t worry about this starting off, as it will subconsciouly force you down avenues you think you have to go down to make money. Even thought it may not actually be a passion.
 
So I took that advice and tried to drop any expectation and plan around where this would lead.
 
I was working in my 9-5, I had my ‘early retirement extreme’ plan to retire at 40ish, and in the meantime I was cultivating my passions.
 
I’m not where I want to be, but I’m ok.
 
I finally took ownership of my life and was doing something about it. I was moving in the right direction. I was at peace.
 
And then one day what happens?
 
I’m on instagram and I come accross a new profile – Dewey Nielsen. I still remember the moment. I opened up his profile, and what do I see?
  • His last post was the book: The Story of the Human Body
  • He is a Jiu-Jitsu black belt
  • He is a Mobility Coach
I’m getting shivers now remembering that feeling.
 
….”wait a fucking minute….this guy is doing all the 3 things I am passionate about! But what’s his job?! What’s his 9-5?!”
 
I scanned his whole page. Googled him. Looked him up. Did the research.
 
He had no 9-5.
This is what he does.
This IS his career.
This is his life.
 
If he’s doing it, why can’t I?!
 
And that’s what you should be thinking when you look at my life.
 
You can take a ‘why me’ or a ‘try me’ attitude in these situations.
 
And I was all try me after settling for so long beforehand.
 
That was all the proof I needed. All the random dots on this new journey of ‘trying new shit’ and ‘following the sparks’ were aligning.
 
It’s important to realise here that you can only see the obvious pattern when you look back on it.
 
Moving forward is like walking through fog. It will only be clear in hindsight the dots have aligned.
 
As Kierkegaard said: “Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards.
 
So what did I do? I backed up my aspirations with my actions.
 
I signed up to the mobility course that Dewey is a course instructor on, and I went off to Liverpool by myself to it.
 
I was the only one in the room who wasn’t a coach but I didn’t give a shit. You gotta start somewhere.
 
I had passion to burn for this now. I got time. I’ll learn as I go.
 
The starting points don’t matter, it’s your attitude & approach that determines your progress.
 
Jesus nearly 6 years ago now. Here’s me and Dewey below. He’s the one of the left who looks like a model for Calvin Klein.
 
 
Another life changing moment happened at that seminar. On the first day we were all standing around and I saw f**king Kswiss 15 feet from me.
 
Holy shit.
 
I had just followed him a few months ago on Instagram and was absolutely amazed by what he could do with his body.
 
He was like 6”3, 100kg plus, an animal, and he was doing the front & middle splits. Doing crazy shit with his body.
 
What an inspiration he was to me. I was just coming out of the chronic pains and injuries, but was weak and skinny, and wanted to be like Kevin.
 
I’m naturally pretty introverted, but I forced myself to go over.
 
You might not get this chance again Mark! I went over like a fan at a Justin Bieber concert probably. But to my surprise, he was very friendly & accommodating.
 
He was chatting to me for a while and let me be in his group for the course over the weekend.
 
A successful mobility coach, a big name in France who has coached elite famous soccer players, tennis players, and he’s here talking to a skinny recruiter from Dublin who says he wants to be a coach!
 
I was like a pig in shit.
 
He gave me all the time in the world. If you wonder why I give out so much free info and try to help everyone I can – its because I’ve been helped by so many people along the way selflessly.
 
They went out of their way to help me succeed even thought they didn’t know me or owe me anything, and I want to do the same for you
 
(you aren’t a success unless you are making others a success – a wise coachpig once told me. Another man who reached out randomly to support me on my journey, and now we are good friends!)
 
I still remember at one point Kevin telling me he knows I will be a great coach. That he can see the passion in me and I will kill it. He said I would be one of the best coaches.
 
I was so embarrassed that someone like him would say that to me. Embarrassed but honored.
 
If you follow Kswiss you know he’s all about team no bullshit. He says it as it is, for mobility and life. And I knew he meant what he said. He truly thought I will be a great coach.
 
It’s like Ronaldo coming down to your local 5 -a-side on a Tuesday evening and telling you that he thinks you have what it takes to make it as a soccer player.
 
I felt like I could walk on water that day. It taught me the impact someone’s words can have on you.
 
One sentence he has probably long forgotten, has stayed with me for life.
 
So of course what happens? I do like we all do: I left the seminar from walking on water, and back to reality. I went back into my shell and didn’t make my first mobility post like I told Kswiss I would.
 
And what happens? Kswiss DM’s me on Instagram “where’s that first post? I don’t see it”.
 
Oh fuck. “I’ll have it up by Sunday I swear!”. Double fuck!!
 
I used to be all fluff, but I had committed to becoming a man of my word by then. If I make a promise I will keep it.
 
At around 11pm on that Sunday night, I made my first post.
 
A few weeks later, I got my first client, and the rest is history. It all snowballed from there.
 
So there we go. That’s how the journey got started!!!
 
What a random empowering journey it was. I never thought I’d be here, but that’s the beauty of it.
 
You don’t know life will take you. Your passions are constantly evolving and changing. I have moved onto coaching other things since the mobility. That’s how it works.
 
Nothing is set in stone, its a constant process of cultivating your passions.
 

Following Your Own Path (Ikigai)

 
You can’t start with the end in mind if you don’t know what that end is. Don’t shoot yourself in the foot before you even start.
 
Cultivate courage & trust in yourself that you will make the right decisions once you are on this path. Follow the crumbs of curiosity.
 
Trusting yourself is the way to keep moving forward and navigating the unknown. Don’t worry about ‘is this the right decision to follow this or not’.
 
Understand that every decision, is the right decision.
 
If you feel the spark and want to follow it then do – it’ll either turn into a flame or it will die out.
 
Either way: it was the right decision. Because it has taught you more about yourself and what you like/don’t like.
 
That’s progress and a deeper understanding of yourself. Which are crucial checkpoints on your own path that will all make sense once you look back over it in years to come. With that 20/20 hindsight vision.
 
When you find your passion(s), you can move to the next step if you want.
 
This is where you find the intersection of:
  • meaning
  • fulfillment
  • sustainable profit
  • a useful service to the world
It takes time. It’s like a jigsaw puzzle you don’t have the map for.
 
Keep laying down pieces each day until you see the patterns. Brick by brick, you will build your future.
 
I only realised afterwards that the path I took is similar to the Japanese concept called ‘Ikigai: a reason for being’.
 
Which states that your passion/purpose or ‘reason for being’ is at the intersection of:
  • Doing what you love
  • Doing what you are good at
  • In something the world needs
  • In something you can be paid for
 
This is why one of my north stars in life is to follow the results. Becuase they usually all lead in the same direction, no matter what religion, ethnicity, tribe, country etc you are from.
 
I took random bits from wise men of the west to show how I found my passion & purpose in life, then I find out the men of the east had the same forumla!
 
Humans all have the same fundamental needs and desires in life, whether you realise it or not.
 
One of them is a life of passion & purpose. Being your true self on a missin helping others in things you love.
 
If humans have no passion or purpose, they stray towards pleasure. To meet our needs in more destructive ways.
 
Do you think a drug addict wants to be miserable? No, they are escaping something. That moment on drugs is the only moment they can be numb and away from it all.
 
They could have taken that route, or a route to healing and create purpose in helping other addicts overcome drug addiction.
 
You see how in one scenario he’s a hero, and in the other scenario he’s a villain. But its the same human, just led down different paths.
 
As you can see in most people (including myself): usually your passion/purpose is linked to solving your own problems. Solving the issues that plagued your life.
 
Why does this work? Because YOU are the target market. You have been through it and know the way out, so you can speak to people like the younger you as you know exactly what’s its like.
 
You know what they are going through, and what they need to hear.
 
How did I build a business coaching people in:
 
1) Physical Freedom
2) Mental Freedom
3) Lifestyle Design
 
It’s because for most of my life I struggled & settled for:
 
1) Chronic pain & injury  (Had to give up sports & activities I loved. Lost my Physical Freedom)
2) Social anxiety & not being my true self (Lived behind a mask. Imprisoned by my own mind. No Mental Freedom)
3) Stuck in 9-5s I had no passion & purpose for (Building someone else’s vision over my own. No Lifestyle Design blueprint)
 
At 23, I finally committed to building the life true to myself or die trying. For me, and nobody else.
 
But once I:
 
Regained my Physical Freedom and got back to sports I love.  Attained Mental Freedom and became who I knew I could be. Created the Lifestyle Design that I wanted.
 
My purpose since then is to inspire & educate others on the same path. Those who don’t want to settle for anything less than the life true to themselves. I quit my Facebook job in 2019 to pursue this full time and never looked back.
 
You can turn your mess into your message.
You can turn the poison from your life into a tonic for others.
We all have our medicine to offer the world.
 

If you are ready to cultivate your passion & purpose, join us in the Lifestyle Design University.

Don’t Settle,
Mark

Pain Is Protective, Not Destructive

You probably live in fear of pain.

You think it’s destructive.

You run from pain, instead of understanding what it’s trying to teach you.

I’ve lived in fear of pain for most of my life. And most of my clients have too.

It’s not a nice experience.

The pain consumes you and sucks your enjoyment out of life.

In this newsletter my aim is to bring you from a prisoner of pain, to a student of pain.

This is a crucial component on the road back to Physical Freedom.

Prisoners of Pain

Most people are prisoners of pain.

They live in fear of movement. They live in fear of their own bodies.

You hurt your back before so now you think you have a ‘bad back’:

  • You stop bending down in certain ways
  • You hyperfocus on simple movements you did easily before
  • You slowly reduce movement more & more over time

Now over months, years & decades…..you have become the tin man.

You have joined the chronic pain crew. Your quality of life takes a nosedive, and you can’t do things you love anymore.

Sophie is the latest client to finish up the Physical Freedom Program.

She was one of these prisoners. Suffering with chronic pain in multiple joints: back, shoulders, and knees.

She had previously been very active doing weightlifting and sailing, but had to stop these due to chronic pains.

When you are a prisoner of pain, you have a much worse quality of life. You also can’t do things you love anymore.

What’s the common advice we get?

  • Rest it and protect it (only makes it weaker and more stiffness/pain)
  • Judged for not wanting to settle (projection of self-limiting beliefs)
  • Settle and retire (leads to regret. You have to live with it, they don’t)

These approaches keep us in prison. And that’s where most people stay for life.

Chronic pain is one of the most prevalent issues in the world, affecting millions of people everyday.

The difference between you and actual prisoners, is that you have the choice to leave.

You don’t have to live that way, even though it feels like you are trapped.

The way out is through understanding.

The pain you thought was tormenting you, was actually trying to teach you.

The Misunderstood Teacher

Have you ever had a teacher that you thought was a nutjob?

Only to find out years/decades later that they were very wise in their own way?

That they were actually teaching you many important lessons? I have many. One springs to mind, but that’s a story for another day.

Pain is the same: it’s misunderstood.

Pain is protective, not destructive.

It’s an evolutionary adaptation that has kept the human species alive until now:

  • If you burn your arm in a fire, pain teaches you to stay away
  • If you break a limb, pain teaches you to take your weight off it
  • If you get betrayed, pain teaches you to make a wiser choice next time

Pain is a teacher that helps us navigate through life more safely from every experience we have.

The goal of survival is built into us and all species. And pain is a crucial part of being able to learn how to survive.

I did a deep dive YouTube video on “What Pain Is & How to Manage It” already. But I will touch on one main point from that here: the bio-psycho-social model of pain.

This is one of the most up-to-date models on pain. It takes the very complex topic of pain, and puts it into a model we can work with.

The first thing to understand in terms of chronic pain is that there is no one cause for pain.

So straight away, you see how 99% of the stuff you are told in the mainstream/healthcare route is bullshit.

How the ‘expert’ has found out how ‘X diagnosis’ is the cause of your pain after their magical assessment. It’s not.

They either:

  • don’t know enough about how the human body works to realise this is incorrect (incompetence)
  • do know but are deceiving you for money (lack of integrity).

Either way, it’s a massive red flag.

It’s been proven that pain is multifactoral, but of course we aren’t told that.

We believe reductionist opinions like “tight hamstring = lower back pain“, which is part of the problem. You stretch your hamstrings, but the pain may not go away, then you chase the next ’cause’.

Over time when nothing works, you think you are f***ed & settle. Another prisoner of pain behind bars now.

The biopsychosocial model gets us closer to the truth of pain.

The model shows how pain comes from 3 areas:

  • Biology (your body)
  • Psychology (your beliefs/thoughts/emotions)
  • Social (the people you are around/the environment you are in)

As you can see in the picture, pain is at the intersection.

Pain is a combination of all these factors.

So what can we do? We can tick as many boxes as we can in each area. Just like you would with a nutrition plan to manage your hunger signal.

That’s what I did with Sophie. As a result:

  • Her back pain hugely improved
  • Her knee knee pain and shoulder pain significantly improved
  • Her mobility and strength have noticeably improved
  • She got back to sailing and can strength train in the gym with minimal pain.

Pain doesn’t mean you are f**ked. That there is something wrong with you or your body. That you have to settle.

Pain means that you have areas of the bio-psycho-social model that you have to address.

You need to work on your mobility and how your body moves.

You need to work on your education and learn how your body functions.

You need to work on your social stressors and manage them.

This is the way to escape the prison of pain that most people are kept in for a lifetime.

Life’s Greatest Tormentor or Teacher?

Like most things in life, there are two paths to walk down.

You can let pain become your greatest tormentor in life, or it can become your greatest teacher.

Pain has taught me more in my life than anything else. For my body, mindset & life.

Pain is the most potent catalyst.
The driver of transformation.
The excavator of unearthed potential.

Pain is a request for change. But not everyone answers.

Listen and learn, or ignore it and stay behind bars.

One path leads to a life of understanding and increased potential.

The other leads to settling and a life of regret.

Physical Freedom Program

Sophie came from chronic pain and forced to settle. (giving up sailing & the gym).

To not settling, regaining her physical freedom, and winning a world championship masters race in sailing!

What an inspiration Sophie is. Read her story below.

If you don’t want to settle for anything less than your Physical Freedom like Sophie, now is the time.

Physical Freedom Program
Application form 

Don’t Settle,
Mark

How to Manage Chronic Pain In Work

If you suffer from chronic pain, you know the fear & frustration of trying to deal with it in work.

Worrying that you won’t last through a long meeting.

Getting annoyed at your desk as you can’t concentrate on your job.

Trying to appear normal but the tightness & pain is doing your head in.

An ergonomic chair or a standing desk isn’t the answer, it’s only treating the symptoms, not the root cause.

In this newsletter I will share the strategy & tactics I use with clients to manage chronic pain in work.

Chasing the Wrong Culprit

There is nothing wrong with using the standing desk, or the ergonomic chair.

I’m not saying they aren’t useful, I had them myself back in the 9-5 days.

But it’s not addressing the bigger picture.

The issue isn’t our ‘posture’, the issue is our lack of movement throughout the day.

So relying on different tools that try to put is in ‘better postures’ won’t work.

The best posture is the next posture.

The special chair or standing desks will probably help, it will probably give some relief, but it won’t solve the overall issue of chronic pain & tightness in work.

We are not designed to be sedentary. We are designed to move.

For the deep dive on this, you can read the story of the human body.

What do the special forces of the army do when they have a mission? They utilise strategy & tactics to ensure they get the job done.

We are going to do the same.

Now that we know the main issue, we can approach it with a solid strategy & tactics.

Strategy & Tactics

A strategy is “a plan of action, a long term or overall aim”.

And tactics are “an action or strategy carefully planned to achieve a specific end”.

In simple terms

  • Strategy: the overall long term plan (overcoming chronic pain)
  • Tactics: the smaller plans within the big strategy, that help you move forward towards achieving the overall aim

The higher level strategy is:

1) Understanding what pain is
2) Working on a mobility program

The lower level tactics you can employ in work are:

1) Movement snacks
2) Micro movements

1) Understand What Pain Is (Strategy)

To get long term progress with any issue, you need to start with why.

If you don’t actually know what pain is, you will never know how to manage it.

I have covered this already with an in-depth free resource: what pain is & how to manage it 

This covers the bio-psycho-social model of pain (and many other things). It will radically change your understanding & experience of pain.

If you are already aware of this, you can go to step 2.

2) Mobility Program (Strategy)

Now that you understand how your pain is basically a combination of a multitude of factors across:

  • your biology
  • your psychology
  • your social circle/environment

We can start ticking the biology boxes with a program for your specific movement limitations.

You can read more about the framework I use to design clients programs here: how to build a resilient body.

Starting off I usually split client programs up into:

  • daily movements (5-10 mins)
  • harder exercises (30-60 mins)

This addresses the reactive approach we have with our bodies. (you brush your joints everyday now like your teeth).

And it also enables you to do your daily routine (or some of your harder exercises) as part of the movement snacks tactic.

1) Movement Snacks (Tactic)

“There is no perfect posture. The only ‘bad’ posture is the one you spend too long in”.

That line changed my life in terms of dealing with chronic pain during my 9-5 days.

Sitting on a special chair all day, standing at your elevated desk all day, these aren’t the silver bullet.

The answer isn’t being a robot in a certain ‘good’ position, the answer is variety.

You can achieve this through movement variability. Through movement snacks spread throughout the day.

Instead of reactively waiting for my back or neck to ache, I started proactively getting up from my desk at the first sign (or even before) any tightness came.

I would either:

  • go for a walk to get water/tea/coffee
  • do a lap of the floor/building/walk outside
  • do my daily routine/harder movements in the disabled bathroom or training room

Then back to my desk 10 mins later feeling resfreshed, instead of uncomfortable & frustrated.

Nobody notices. People who have worked with me in the past reading this won’t have known.

2) Micro Movements (Tactic)

One of the simplest things you can do to ease chronic pain/tightness at work?

Just change position.

You can:

  • Sit off at an angle instead of upright
  • Stand instead of sitting
  • Sit in the coffee area chairs instead of at your desk.

Sometimes all it takes is a little adjustment in your chair, or sitting somewhere else.

Have a few positions that you can alternate between during the day that feel good, and rotate between them.

As I write this now at my apartment from my little office set up, I am leaning onto the left arm of the desk chair.

I’ll stay here for 20 mins or so until it gets slightly uncomfortable, then I’ll switch to the other side or back to the middle.

Or cross one leg over the other, and vice versa after that gets a little uncomfortable.

I switch between this office set up and my couch throughout the day too. 2 hour block on the couch, break. 2 hour block at the desk.

No rules, I just do what feels good and keeps me pain free & productive.

Its so ingrained and part of my life now that I don’t even notice. I just got reminded of it here writing this!

But I still remember the old days of looking for the best stretch that will stop my chronic neck tightness forever. For my hip. For my back.

They are dead end illusions. No one stretch will solve it.

The problem isn’t your body. Your body wasn’t designed for sedentary office work as we discussed.

The problem is the lack of movement, so we need to follow a process of movement.

Movement snacks & micro movements are a very easy and effective way to get this done.

Be proactive with this and you will notice the massive difference in how you feel day to day.

With your body and your work output.

Proactively Combat the Issue

The key is proactively looking after your body, and fitting this into your daily life.

Start your movement snacks & micro movements this week and you will see the difference in how you move & feel.

Along with your work output not being affected by constant tightness & pain.

You have a lot more control over your chronic pain & injury than you think.

Don’t Settle,
Mark

 

The Story of the Human Body

The first book I read that opened my eyes to where we have actually come from was ‘The Story of the Human Body’ by Daniel Lieberman.

This book shattered most of the misinformation I had followed on the human body from the mainstream all my life. It’s the book that started my journey to physical freedom.

This book is about evolutionary biology. It starts the journey of the human body all the way from the beginning of humans in Africa 6 million years ago, all the way up to now.

We share 99% of our DNA with chimps if you are unaware. We have a common ancestor.

This books tracks the evolution of the human body the whole way through those 6 million years, and all the adaptations that have happened up to now.

It also shows how most of the biggest issues in the world today are man-made. How our exponential progress was a double-edged sword.

We have conquered the planet and rose to the top of the food chain. But this has also led to the decline of our health and the rise of disease.

After reading this, I could see the whole bigger picture of why I was in chronic pain and the route back to my physical freedom.

Along with many other issues in my life.

The Environment Shapes Us

Reading about evolutionary biology will make you realise the massive impact the environment has on your body and life.

Living in this modern environment that we aren’t adapted for, is what has caused the biggest issues of our times.

One of the crucial points Daniel highlights in the book is that most of the issues of today are ‘mismatch diseases’:

Humans living in an environment they are not adapted for.

The following example always stuck with me:

  • In the hunter gatherer days we had an abundance of movement, and very little food
  • In modern life we have an abundance of food, and very little movement

It’s the exact opposite of what we were designed for.

And it all becomes clear why the biggest issues of our times are:

  • Cardiovascular diseases (the biggest killer in the world)
  • Chronic back pain (the biggest chronic pain in the world)
  • Anxiety/depression

They didn’t exist back in the hunter gathererer days, they are man-made mismatch diseases.

Before, you might have to run 10km to get your dinner. Now, you open the fridge or get it delivered to your door. Obesity was inevitable.

Before, you would move through full range of motion each day with an active lifestyle. There were no chairs, you sat in your deep squat. Now, we sit all day and barely move outside of maybe 1 designated hour per day (the gym). Chronic pain & injury was inevitable.

Hence diabetes, cardiovascular disease, chronic pain & injury are prevalent in our times.

This gave me a lightbulb moment: the environment is shaping our body everyday outside of our awareness.

We only notice years or decades later when we start to feel like the tin man.

This shattered the illusion of the ‘experts’ and their ‘diagnoses’ for me. That it’s too late to regain physical freedom.

I could see how they were only giving me their opinion through a narrow keyhole of expertise. Not taking into account the bigger picture of evolution.

My body isn’t f***ed like I’m led to believe, it’s the environment that changed my body from a baby with physical freedom, to the tin man adult I was.

I was being told change is impossible, but yet I have already changed from physical freedom to tin man through the environment of the western world.

Which means I can change back towards more physical freedom. They are 2 sides of the same coin. If one wasn’t possible, the other wouldn’t be.

The environment is the main problem here, not my body. My body can only adapt to the environment I give it.

If I change my environment, I will change my body.

Lifestyle Change

We have to use the knowledge of how crucial the environment is to our body.

We have to factor this into our life.

This lifestyle change will be the most important factor for you to regain physical freedom for the rest of your life.

1) Brush Your Joints

The analogy I use with client to teach them this point is “brush your joints just like your teeth”.

You brush your teeth twice a day without fail, but do nothing for your body, why?

Would you rather:

  • have white teeth at 50 but have a crippled body in a wheelchair?
  • have physical freedom at 50 but have dentures?

Every single person I have asked says physical freedom.

That is what they say, but their ACTIONS are leading them down the other path. Your actions show your priorities in life, not your words.

This analogy highlights the fact that they have the proactive lifestyle change in place for their teeth, but not for their body.

When I was first explained this by a coach around the time I read this book, it blew my mind. Everything started finally making sense.

All the time I had spent looking for the fix, the answers. And the truth was such a simple one all along. One that when you hear it, you don’t understand how you never realised it before.

This lifestyle change is the first crucial pillar to regaining your physical freedom long term.

I teach clients how to incorporate this proactive approach for their bodies going forward, just like they do for their teeth.

Because I don’t just want to help clients overcome chronic pain & injury and have them fall back into it again when they leave.

I am here to empower clients to keep their physical freedom going forward for life.

When you understand this lifestyle change pillar, you can see why you are always on the roundabout of injuries & average progress.

The mainstream route is all a reactive approach, not proactive. So you will keep going back to them forever without getting the results you want.

Like a person who is confused by his teeth going black & falling out when he never brushes them. Even though he goes to his regular dentist appointment.

2) Determine Your Priorities

Now that I have brought this into your awareness, you have to decide your own priorities in life.

If you value your teeth more than your body, keep going as you are.

If you value your teeth more (or atleast) as much as you value your teeth, start prioritising them too.

Otherwise you are living a lie. You are saying you prioritise your body, but you aren’t. Aspirations not backed up by actions are where regret comes from.

As Musashi says: “Truth is not what you want it to be; it is what it is. You can bend to it’s power or live a lie”.

After facing this harsh truth, I started taking a proactive approach with my body 6 years ago.

I brush my joints each morning just like I brush my teeth, still to this day.

I don’t think about it. It’s just part of my life now.

If you want long term success in any part of your life, you make the crucial task part of who you are, not something you ‘do’.

I’m a person who values my physical freedom highly. So I look after my body each day. Period.

You have to make your choice.

3) Daily Movements

If you choose to prioritise your body by brushing your joints daily, there are many ways to incorporate this into your life.

For each client, I split their program up into:

  • Daily movements (5 mins daily)
  • Harder exercises (30-60 mins x 3 times per week)

The daily movements are there to build this proactive lifestyle change into their routines.

After working with hundreds of clients & getting testimonials that could make me look like a guru, do you want the truth on what clients usually tell me helped them the most?

The daily movements. The proactive approach of looking after their body.

The height of cultivation runs through simplicity, to quote Bruce Lee. A man who knew a thing or two about getting results.

If you want to stick with something, you need to make it as easy & effective as possible.

Like I tell clients on the consultation call before signing up: if you can’t prioritise atleast 5 mins a day for the only body you will ever have, then I can’t help you.

A harsh truth.

But the other side of harsh truths is the progress you want but couldn’t get before.

Change Your Environment, Change Your Body

Your body isn’t f***ed.

Your athletic pursuits aren’t over.

This isn’t how your story has to end.

If you change the environment you give your body each day, your body will start to change.

This is not my opinion, this is science. This is mother nature.

This is a fundamental law of nature that us humans can’t skip.

Adam & Frances are 2 clients from the Physical Freedom Program who come to mind for this topic.

You can see them specifically say how much the lifestyle change/daily movements helped them regain physical freedom.

Look past the big picture transformation to the process behind it. There is nothing special about it, they just followed an effective process.

Address this pivotal lifestyle change, or become part of the statistic suffering from the mismatch disease of chronic pain & injury.

Focus on the process & the outcome takes care of itself.

You have a lot more control than you are led to believe.

Don’t Settle,
Mark

The 3 ways I can help you:

1) Physical Freedom Program:

  • My 1:1 coaching program on how to overcome chronic pain & injury, and reach your athletic potential
  • I have worked with 100s of clients, across 37 different sports/activities, over 3 separate continents. Covering injuries to all joints in the human body
  • Join those not settling for their movement limitations here

2) Mental Freedom Course

  • My self-awareness course that teaches you how to stop looping & suffering, and skillfully navigate your own mind
  • Most people are a slave to their subconscious, constantly playing out the same undesirable patterns in their life
  • Here you will understand why you are the way you are, and how to break free to become who you always wanted to be

3) Lifestyle Design University

  • From must €49, you can have the blueprint to design the life true to yourself
  • You will learn how to create a vision, how to use my self-development system, and how to move the levers to freedom which close the gap towards the life you want
  • Now you will avoid the biggest regret of humanity in the process: “not living a life true to myself, living the life others expected of me”

Life Lessons From 4 Years In Business

I only realised last week that it’s been 4 years since I left the 9-5 life.

I quit my Facebook job in November 2019. To pursue my passion of helping others not settle & live true to themselves.

Starting with the Physical Freedom Program, then the Mental Freedom Course, and finally the Lifestyle Design University.

I track all my stats. A quick look tells me: 

  • 133 clients across the 3 pillars
  • Client results I am extremely proud of
  • €126,339 in total revenue

Pfff. What do you think younger Marcus?! Have you got something to say? Something to share? Or who are you to do anything eh?!

I have clients in the Lifestyle Design University at the start of their coaching journey. Overcoming the same limiting beliefs that I had back then.

I share to show you that it’s what everyone feels. It’s part of the process.

I’d actually be worried if you DIDN’T have those thoughts. The dunning-kruger effect bell would be ringing.

Things are going pretty well now. I would say I am content, but not satisfied.

I still want to push on and progress myself and the business. But I am at peace, proud of how far I have come, enjoying life, and excited for the future.

I will never forget how it started though. I still remember: 

  • my first client: a friend’s Auntie I was helping for free who forced me to take €50 and wouldn’t take no for an answer
  • my first rented space: an old smelly clubhouse in a tiny chess room with leftover jam sandwiches on the table.
  • Having no reputation. No social proof. No “degree” in this industry
  • Competing against people who have gone to college and have years/decades in this industry

Would you choose a degree and get no results, or get results but they have no degree?

My own journey to physical freedom taught me what really matters. Following the results over all else. 

I knew the truth from the start: Time will either promote you or expose you.

Even though I was at the bottom starting off, I knew time was going to promote me. Because my heart was in the right place, and I hunt for results over all else.

And I knew that it would expose a lot of people who stick to dogma & ego over actually helping the client.

Over a long enough time horizon, the cream will rise to the top. And I had no timeline, no end date for when I would give myself permission to quit. I was playing the long game. Like I still am now.

There are some moments in life that define who you are. And November 2019 was one of mine.

Quitting my Facebook job where I was saving 2k a month. Set up for life.

With all the vices of man available to me, I chose my integrity over all else.

I can’t be bought. I can’t be manipulated. I can’t be deterred from the purpose I feel in my heart.

Those are the men I respect, and that is the man I chose to become.

A dying breed in our time unfortunately. As we live in a ‘genocide of authenticity’ as Gabor Mate elegantly put it.

But I am being the change I want to see in the world. I am doing my part. 

From the outside, you wouldn’t have bet on me 4 years ago. You’d expect me to end up in the statistic of not making it past 3 years. Like the vast majority of businesses.

But if you could see inside my head and heart back then, you’d have put the house on me.

I had quit on my soccer career before, quit on myself. So it’s not something that I always had. I’ve had broken, lifeless, aimless periods of my life.

But when you follow the path you are told to take, get high up that ladder, and find out it was all an illusion, you know the only path forward in life:

Not settling anymore. Living true to yourself at all costs.

I settled up to 23. But from 23 until I’m 6 feet under, I made a promise to myself to live true to myself above all else.

I talk a lot about the don’t settle attitude now, as it has been the foundation of success for me ever since that moment.

At least in the worst-case scenario now, I will have gained my own self-respect. I will be at peace.

No matter the outcome: I will be happy & proud of who I am, instead of filled with shame, guilt & regret like before.

The biggest recorded deathbed regret of humanity is: “I wish I had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me”.

It’s one thing hearing it. But you’ll really learn this lesson once you experience it for yourself.

I will write a separate newsletter on “How I quit my Facebook job and made the same take-home pay 3 years later”.

That will be all the business strategies etc.

For the purpose of this newsletter, I will cover the life lessons I learned from going through the journey.

Let’s get to it!

Life Lessons From 4 Years In Business

1) Live True to Yourself Over Money 

At 23 I was 2k in debt, soon to be 4k shortly after.

This road looked bleak. Forced to work forever in jobs I had no passion for?! Fuck that.

That’s when I dove into how to achieve financial freedom, and got to work implementing it in my own life.

After about 4 years of smart work and the grind, I had set myself up pretty well: 

  • 30k saved
  • Saving 2k a month in FB (climbing the corporate ladder + implementing saving strategies)
  • Income from my side passion meeting the bills

I would have saved 25k a year minimum going forward from that set-up (as I didn’t include bonuses, shares, etc).

If I stayed in the 9-5, my net worth would be around 130K now.

(the 30k saved + the 100k saved in the last 4 years). And I’d be saving 3 or 4k a month now.

If I took that path, the calculation for when I would become a millionaire would be 24 years from now. At 55.

This obviously isn’t including the cost of a mortgage in future & kids etc. But I also didn’t include any increase in salary, compound interest from investments etc too.

Anyway, you get the point. The ‘promised land’ was ahead of me.

So how did I feel with all that laid out ahead of me? When I finally sorted my life out and got myself into a good position?

As I sat in Facebook eating my hotel-level dinner, after doing Jiu-Jitsu at lunchtime?

I felt fucking empty. I felt sick in my stomach at times. I was living a lie.

I have all this passion inside. All these things I love and want to do, but I push them down. Nobody sees who I really am, because if they did, they would know this isn’t the place for me.

So I’ll play the game, keep the peace, and spend my life here right?! Because money, mortgage, pension, bla de bla?!

Near the end I was talking myself out of quitting each week. Slowly selling my soul for money was becoming harder and harder to rationalise.

“But Mark……..it’s fucking 2k a month!!!! for a job you can literally do in 4 hours!!!”

That logic only kept me for so long.

I hope you have a moment like this before you get too old. So that you can see the truth that we all hear but don’t internalise.

Money doesn’t make you happy. It’s the freedom money gives you that does.

It’s not the physical notes in your hand, or the digital numbers on your screen. It’s the freedom it gives you: 

  • The freedom to do things you are passionate about each day
  • The freedom to drive, eat, do whatever you want
  • The freedom to have complete autonomy over your life
  • The freedom to do whatever the fuck you want

And once you sort your own financial freedom to a level where you have these things, the money ceases to matter.

Studies show that your happiness increases with your income, but then it plateaus at a certain level.

Once you hit this level, no amount of money makes any difference. And that was my exact experience.

When I was 4k in debt dreading life, the money was a huge driver for my own freedom in life. And it makes sense, as I was on the lower rungs of Maslow’s hierarchy of needs.

But as I sat there in the Facebook building seeing 2k a month go into my savings account, I didn’t give a shit anymore.

I was up near the top of the needs ladder now. Self-actualisation is what I wanted, not more money.

You are going to spend on average a 3rd of your life working. You have 2 choices: 

  • help someone else build their vision
  • build your own vision

And I decided that I wasn’t going to spend any more time dedicating my life to building someone else’s vision. It was time to take the plunge and build my own.

I had already set my own personal financial freedom goal that I would be happy to leave with.

This is what I teach you in the financial freedom section of the Lifestyle Design University: how to set your own financial freedom targets, along with all the strategies I used to hit them.

Because it’s your life, and nobody else’s. You decide how you want to live it. You have to live with the regret otherwise, the people you are listening to don’t.

My financial freedom trade-off point where money would no longer take priority over living true to myself was: 

  • 30k saved
  • Income from my passion meeting the bills 

Once I hit that, I was gone within a few weeks. 

2) Continue to Follow Your Internal Compass

A quick snapshot of the 4 years are:

2019 – The vision is born (still just a passion)
2020 – 1st year in business
2021 – Momentum
2022 – The year of serious business
2023 – The year I build

2019 was when I knew I wanted to help people in things I am passionate about as my career.

I cultivated the don’t settle attitude, and committed 100% to this.

The outcomes don’t matter, timelines don’t deter me, I will follow this path to the end.

2020 was my first official year full-time. The transition from passion to business and trying to find my feet.

2021 was when the small gains started adding up, and I knew I could make this happen. That I can make a decent living from my passion.

2022 was when I signed up to a fitness business mentor and aimed to reach 10k a month in income. I achieved it for one month that year (turned out to be 8.5k).

I also made the same take-home pay that year, that I did in my last year at Facebook.

Made it right?! Nope. This path wasn’t the one I wanted to follow. I wanted to do things differently long-term.

I had to remind myself that I left Facebook years ago to live true to myself over money. I was nearly getting caught in essentially the same trap here.

8-10 hour days. Getting some clients into my business that weren’t the best fit etc.

My business compass was drifting away from my internal compass. So I left that mentor group, instead of implementing things they wanted me to.

I follow my internal compass over all else (integrity, vision & values).

I show you how to build your own internal compass in the vision section of the Lifestyle Design University.

2023 was the year I recalibrated my internal compass with my business compass. I took a step back to build the foundations of a successful business true to me.

I solo travelled Asia for 3 months. Worked 2-4 hours a day. And started building the foundations for a business more in tune with my internal compass: 

  • these deep dive valuable newsletters, over shallow gimmicky sales tactics 
  • branched out officially to other programs (Mental Freedom Course/Lifestyle Design University)

I’ve made less money this year than last year as a result of following my internal compass.

But I am extremely proud of the clients I have helped, the programs I have built, and the future impact I will have through this path.

I’m set up well with my financial freedom strategies, so there is never any fear.

This gives you space to make money in a way that’s true to you, over selling out from fear and the need for money like the majority do.

3) Perfectionism

“Perfectionism is procrastination masquerading as quality control” – Chris Williamson.

I didn’t realise that I suffered with this until year 3 in business.

I had so much information in my head that I would tell clients. I would show them everything in the sessions, from exercises to teaching the theory.

It was all down to me and my expertise. If I died, all of it would have gone into thin air.

I had never put it down properly into educational vidoes, or exercise videos, as I wanted it to be perfect.

My mentor at the time encouraged us all to build out our programs with an education hub, and I felt the block again.

But when I went through his own education module called “the imperfect program”, it really hit me hard.

The whole point being that your program & coaching will never be perfect. So if you wait for that point, it will never happen.

You are leaving value on the table for your impact with clients, all because you can’t overcome your own mental limitations.

Oooof. Harsh truth accepted.

How did I actually go ahead and start building the education hub for the Physical Freedom Program back then? I told myself I’d redo it all in time!! That’s it’s just for now.

It’s what let me drop the perfectionism and just do it.

As I tell Lifestyle Design clients who are on their coaching journey: the truth is that I already had more than enough knowledge in my head to help 99% of humans overcome chronic pain & injury.

But I understand how it doesn’t feel like that in the moment.

Now through the Mental Freedom work, I clearly see this block and how to dismantle it and move forward. But back then, I was never even aware of it.

Hence why I branched out to the Mental Freedom Course. I wish I had this at the start of my journey, not the end.

I would have been able to play life & business on medium/easy mode, instead of hard mode.

4) We Learn from the Extremes (Finding Your Balance)

This is leading on from point 3.

I had heard of perfectionism before, and how you shouldn’t let it hold you back. But that didn’t help me learn the lesson did it?

Hearing something isn’t enough unfortunately. A lot of the time we have to go through it ourselves.

I mean who signs up to the Physical Freedom Program? People who have never experienced chronic pain & injury?! Or people who have experienced and been plagued with it for years or decades?

You can’t skip the experience a lot of the time. You have to go to the extremes to learn the lesson.

After all, how can you find where your ‘balance’ is, if you haven’t gone to the extremes of the spectrum?

We learn from the extremes. This is where our perspectives are changed.

I’ve gone to the extremes and learned where my ‘balance’ is for a lot of things in the last 4 years:

  • Training
  • Money
  • Routine
  • Relationships

I’ve gone to the extreme of training like a disciplined machine towards my goals. Tunnel vision. Nothing will stop me.

And of course I made great progress and achieved the front front splits, handstand pushup, close to one arm chin up etc!

Great right?! Yes & no.

The ‘no’ being when I look back and see how I neglected other areas of my life at times. It was extreme, even though it appeared normal to me at the time.

One of the extreme moment for me: telling someone I loved to get out of my apartment and come back later, as I’m not finished training.

What kind of girlfriend comes over in the middle of a 2 hour one-arm chin up session anyway?! Selfish women eh?

Hmmm. I found out months later that she went home in tears.

I couldn’t look back on that memory without welling up myself for a long time. I am a kind, caring man deep down. But I struggled to show it to those I cared about all my life. And I would get stuck in my tunnel vision towards my training & business goals.

During my most intense training periods, I treated those I loved like an afterthought.

And the shame & guilt ate away at me for a long time when I came out of tunnel vision. When I realised how I had hurt people I care about the most.

The Mental Freedom work was the only way for me to: 

  • to forgive myself & gain peace
  • to finally understand why I was the way I was & how to change
  • how to access all parts of myself and show love to those I care about

For money: I went to the extremes of making a few hundred a month, to a month where I made 8.5k.

This taught me the lesson for my own balance for this season of my life: 2-5k. (my total expenses are around 1.5-2k)

For routine: I went to the extremes of working 30-60 mins a day or so on my passion while I worked in Facebook, to 8-10 hour days in the highest income months.

This taught me the lesson for my own balance at this season of my life: 4-6 hours while prioritising other areas of life.

For relationships: I realised from being around people all the time, to being a lone wolf forging my own path, that social connection is an integral part of life even for introverts. 

As one of the biggest studies ever completed showed us:

“The Harvard study, having spanned over 80 years and multiple generations, clearly recognizes good relationships as the most significant predictor of overall happiness, life satisfaction, and well-being” – Waldinger & Schulz, 2023

I learned that lesson the hard way. Sipping a beer to celebrate my 8.5k month from my room in Rome, on my solo travel around Europe.

Everything I wanted for so long. Physical freedom, the lifestyle design I wanted, money, whatever.

And how did I feel? I felt lonely.

I only wanted one thing: the company of the woman I treated like an afterthought and broke up with.

Hindsight is 20/20 eh?!

You can see this point in the true story of Christopher McCandless too (made into a film: “Into the Wild”).

After graduating college and set to enter the 9-5 life, he decided to give most of his money to charity and head off into the wild on his own path.

When his body was found after he died from starvation, they found his last diary entry:

“happiness is only real when shared”

That wisdom hit me hard, as I had a less extreme version of it as you saw.

I finally designed the life I wanted……but for who? Just me?!

I realised how lonely that life was going to be, how I had missed the bigger picture. And that’s the moment I started to prioritise relationships in my life.

From family, to friends, to romantic relationships. I am open to finding my life partner for the first time in my life now. 

5) The Seasons of Life

When you are in a certain stage of life, it’s hard to imagine that you will change.

Just like a fish doesn’t understand there is a world above the water.

But you will in time. And when it happens a few times, you will start to become aware of (and appreciate) the different seasons of life.

I will bring you through the stages of life I have gone through over the last 4 years: 

  • The monk mode phase (forging my own path)
  • The grind phase (training like a madman. Tunnel vision)
  • The business phase (10k a month aim. Business focus)
  • The masculinity phase (protect, provide, procreate)

I am only entering the ‘masculinity’ phase this year. At 31.

I’ve done all the things I dreamed of years ago: I can be anywhere, I can do anything. Financial freedom, location freedom.

And what did I want to do after the 3 months in Asia this year? 

(watch the Asia Solo Trip Recap & Takeaways YouTube video here)

Go to Australia? South America maybe?!

The truth is I just wanted to come home. So I did.

I wanted to live back in Ireland: 

  • in my own routine
  • working and training
  • and being around my family & friends

The ‘masculinity’ phase for me, means that the focus is coming off me.

I detached from the world at 23, and put myself over everyone & everything for the first time in my life.

But now at 31, it’s not just about me anymore, it’s about my future family. 

I am moving into the protector/provider/procreator role. I am setting up my life where I can protect & provide for my future family.

The moment in Rome showed me what I really value now: It’s not all about designing the life I want by myself anymore, I want a life partner to live it with. I want to build a family & legacy.

And if that never happens, cool. But I will get all the pieces in place anyway. As this will set me up in a good position in life regardless.

Now in the last 6 months I have: 

  • Bought my first car
  • Moved into a double room instead of my single
  • Got private health insurance
  • Many more other small things to set me up to protect & provide for others

I know a car isn’t an asset, it drains money from you. That’s why I had most of it in index funds before.

But now that my values & season of life have changed, that overrides the goal of saving money. And puts the emphasis on my future family.

7) The Don’t Settle Attitude Is Your Foundation

None of the other points would have been learned if I didn’t have the don’t settle attitude in the first place.

It’s your foundation in life to being your true self, and learning the lessons life teaches you along the way.

Many examples would have derailed me along the way otherwise. Two that spring to mind: 

  • My Dad not wanting me to leave Facebook.
  • Covid wiping out all my in-person clients that it took 18 months to get

Along with the other ups and downs of business & life that are part of any journey: the doubts, the imposter syndrome, the insecurities.

But it always came back to my own personal anchor belief:

“You don’t get what you deserve, you get what you settle for”

Nothing is owed to me. The world doesn’t care. If you want something in life, it’s down to you to make it happen.

No matter what happens: I don’t settle. I take ownership of everything in my life, and I keep moving forward in a way that’s true to my internal compass.

Most people give up because their vision is like a little plant in the ground, but mine is like Jack & the fucking beanstalk up into the clouds.

King Kong couldn’t pull this shit down! Never mind the opinions of others or world events.

That’s why the Lifestyle Design University starts with the ‘Vision’ pillar./

The other pillars of “Self-Development” and “Levers to Freedom” are pointless without building your vision and aligning the don’t settle attitude behind it first. 

Lifestyle Design University


I hope you learned some insights from my wisdom over the last 4 years.

If you need some guidance on your own journey, sign up to the Lifestyle Design University.

It’s what younger Mark needed but never had.

The Lifestyle Design University is the blueprint to systematically design the life true to you: 

  • Design the life you want, not the one society/your parents set out for you
  • Follow your own path, instead of being forced down someone else’s
  • Live a life true to yourself, not the life others expect of you (biggest regret on people’s deathbed)
  • Build your vision and be the change you want to see in the world, instead of building someone else’s
  • Monetise your passions if you want. Gain financial & location freedom to live life on your terms

I’ll see you on the inside!

Don’t Settle,
Mark

How to Manage Chronic Pain Flare Ups

1) Understand Pain 

“Your brain cares about survival, not optimal”.

Your brain only has one goal: survival. That’s it.

Pain is ultimately a protective mechanism for survival.

Your brain doesn’t care if you are in ‘chronic pain’. You’re alive.

As far as it’s concerned, all is good. You can survive & reproduce and keep the species living on.

So it’s up to you to learn about the pain mechanism and how to manage it, or else it can stay in undesirable patterns forever.

I have a detailed newsletter on “what pain is and how to manage it”. Read that one for a deeper dive on pain.

Here are 3 analogies you can use to remember why the protective mechanism of pain happens:
• It’s like the driving instructor pulling up the handbrake to protect the driver
• It’s like an overprotective mother grounding you for your own good
• It’s like a fire alarm going off to smoke from the toaster

Protective mechanisms have to be overly cautious.

Otherwise they wouldn’t serve their purpose of protecting you.

You can gain peace knowing the pain signal goes off way before something really bad happens.

And this helps us not to catastrophise, which leads into point 2.

2) Treat It Like A Flu

Common flu symptoms are:

  • Fever/chills
  • Cough
  • Sore throat
  • Runny nose
  • Body aches
  • Headaches
  • Fatigue

And the list goes on.

Now imagine if you DIDN’T know what the flu was.

How would you feel if these symptoms started happening to you for the first time?!

You would be catastrophising & freaking the f**k out!!

You could think you are in your final hour. The grim reaper has called your name.

You would be calling the doctor and getting him over ASAP. You would go through this massive ordeal to find out that yeah, it’s not a big deal. It’s the flu. You’ll be ok.

And it’s the same with chronic pain flare-ups.

Once you understand what a flare up actually is, you can react to it just like you would a flu:

  • You know it has happened for a reason
  • You know you won’t be feeling great for days/weeks/months.
  • But you understand it’s not a big deal
  • You still go on and do what you can in the meantime

Catastrophising is a slippery slope that only makes things
worse.

It’s all downside and no upside. A terrible move on the chessboard of life.

It guarantees you will lose, but yet most people continually take it.

When we catastrophise, we are raising the stakes in our head. It’s like a poker game where you have gone all in.

You’ve made a normal situation into a life-or-death one.

Now you have the accompanying emotions for a high- stakes situation: anxiety, worry, fear etc.

But once you understand what a flare up is, you can handle it in the same way as a flu.

Treating flare ups like the flu enables you to lower the stakes, see it for what it really is, and take back control of the situation in an empowering way.

3) If You Can’t Do What You Want, Do What You Can

This is a frame I use for a lot of things in life.

But it’s very useful to manage flare ups too.

This frame trains us to focus on the opportunity within the obstacle.

Rather than sitting there feeling terrible about the obstacle itself.

If you can’t do what you want = the obstacle.
Do what you can = focus on the opportunity.

For example I have 2 torn meniscus in my knees and can’t do Jiu Jitsu right now. And I utilised this strategy:

If you can’t do what you want: Jiu-Jitsu 
Do what you can: kickboxing & muay thai

Rather than being down about not being able to do Jiu-Jitsu, I started kickboxing for the first time. And I did a month of Muay Thai when I was in Thailand. 

I focused on the opportunities NOT being able to do Jiu-Jitsu gave me.

When a flare up happens you can either take on the victim mindset and focus on what you can’t do. Or cultivate the Don’t Settle attitude and focus on what you can do.

Usually there are 3 options depending on how bad the flare up is:

  • Continue your training as usual (while being mindful not to irritate it further)
  • Modify your training.
  • Stop training something completely (like my Jiu-Jitsu example)

When you focus on what you can do, you are empowered no matter what happens.

Your focus becomes your reality. Choose where you put it wisely.

Don’t Settle,
Mark

Whenever you’re ready, there are 3 ways I can help you:
  1. Physical Freedom Program
    (Overcome chronic pain & injury. Reach your athletic potential)
  2. Mental Freedom Course
    (Stop looping & suffering. Skillfully navigate your own mind)
  3. Lifestyle Design University
    (Avoid the biggest regret of humanity. Design the life true to yourself)